The Myth, Mythos & Myths of the NRA (pt 5: More of the Usual)

There’s more at the door:

Welcome back to our gallery of nuts, butts and gun sluts. I had really been hoping to cover the lot in one shebang, but there’s just sooooo many of them.

Joe was Bush League’s Campaign Manager in the 2000 election. As such, his duties included vetting Dick Cheney for the vice presidency. (As if anything was going to stop “Lil’ Dick” from choosing himself as the Veep candidate.)

After the election, he was rewarded by being named head of FEMA. (Republicans always seem to think that FEMA Director is a political plum to be handed out as a reward. Which probably explains why FEMA got such crappy reviews after Hurricane Andrew (1992) [Pappy Bush]; the Southern Florida Hurricanes (2004) [George “Duh”]; and Katrina (2005) [little Georgie again].)

After stepping down as head of FEMA, he got a $200 million dollar “no-bid” Hurricane Katrina contract from Michael Brown, his hand-picked successor. And of course, as we all remember, Brownie did “a heck of a job” handling the Katrina disaster.

Carol led the fight to allow carrying concealed handguns in Michigan public buildings. You know, like courthouses, city halls, schools, the state capitol buildings, etc. (What could possibly go wrong with that?)                                

As to what Carol’s thoughts of people who think we need a few restrictions in place, I’ll let her speak for herself: “Consider for a moment that the largest and most hysterical anti-gun groups include disproportionately large numbers of women, African- Americans and Jews. And virtually all of the organizations that claim to speak for these ‘oppressed people’ are stridently anti-gun. Not coincidentally, among Jews, Blacks and women there are many ‘professional victims’ who have little sense of identity outside of their victimhood” So there!  ;-P



Bob Barr

Bobby’s a “Family Values” Repug former congressman. He must value families, he was the Impeachment Manager (prosecutor) for the Clinton Impeachment Proceedings. Not only that, he’s been married three times.

He doesn’t care too much for gays, however. Bobby’s the author of the “Defense of Marriage Act” (DOMA) (I wonder which one of his marriages it defends?)             

He’s also a grade A hypocrite. For example: As congressman, he authored an amendment that would prohibit legalizing medical marijuana in in the District of Columbia. After congress (and a $70,000 fee) he lobbied for legalization.

There’s a lot more on this bozo, but I’m tired of him. If you want, check out the link.

Ron w/big dick substitute

Ron w/big dick substitute

Ronnie Barrett

Ronnie’s the founder and CEO of Barrett Firearms Manufacturing Inc. He designed the .50 caliber sniper rifle beloved by terrorists (Al Qaeda bought 25) and Branch Davidians alike.

The .50 has been called “a devastatingly powerful weapon against which most troops, most law enforcement, no civilians, have any means of defense”.

Ronnie calls them “a toy for a big boy“.

He also claims that the 2nd gives you the right to own military-grade weapons. (And, he’ll be glad to sell you some.) Once again, I’ll let him speak for himself: “They moved and took away our legal manufacturer for machine guns [for civilians] because there was a popular television show called ‘Miami Vice’ that was on that everybody was running around shooting everybody up with machine guns and there hadn’t been committed a [crime] committed with a legal machine gun, you know, what, since [1934] or something like that. It was ridiculous. It was Hollywood. But, you know, they said, ‘Oh, we gotta’ do something about that,’ so they took another one of our rights away. And so now you know the right to bear arms is going to be well you can have a sub-, inferior type of weapons. You can’t have really top-notch weapons.”

Machine guns sales to civilians were outlawed in 1934. (Seems to me that’s a bit before “Miami Vice”. And you know, that also would probably explain the dearth of machine gun deaths.)

You’d think he’d know that.

Bobby (A verrrrrry old pic)

Bobby (A verrrrrry old pic)

Bob Brown

Bobby’s the publisher of “Hire a Hit Man” magazine, marketed on the newsstands as “Soldier of Fortune”.

In one instance (of way too many to count in this post) they ran an ad that read: “GUN FOR HIRE: 37-year-old professional mercenary desires jobs. Vietnam veteran. Discrete and very private. Body guard, courier, and other special skills. All jobs considered.” That one ended up costing the rag $4,370,000 in a lawsuit by the victim’s family. Then there was this ad: “Married man looking for an expert in poisons to kill his wife.

Bobby’s response to running these types of ads? “We’re as culpable as any newspaper which accepts an ad from a used-car salesman and doesn’t go out to check the condition of his brakes.

Of course, Bobby’s a “man of action”, so he doesn’t just publish, he gets his hands dirty. He was involved in the civil war in El Salvador. He would have done more, but one of his associates accidentally shot him in the leg. (Professionals! Gotta luv ’em!)

He supplied men (100) and money ($4,000,000) to the Contra Rebels. And, according to him, he fought with the white supremacist “Rhodesian African Rifles” in Rhodesia (natch’) and the Mujahideen in Afghanistan.

All in all, the image of a NRA kinda man!

Governor Jim

Governor Jim

Jim Gilmore

Jimmy used to be Governor of Virginia. He also used to be Chairman of the Republican National Committee. And, he used to be a presidential candidate. (That was back in ’08.)

What he is now, is President & CEO of the Free Congress Foundation. Like all wing-nut groups, its name is very misleading. Their purpose isn’t to free up a paralyzed congress, their purpose is to lead the war against “Cultural Marxism(aka “Political Correctness”).

The FCF has been called the “Christian Right epicenter in the United States“, but they don’t seem very Christian-y.

As part of their “battle plan” against the foe (anyone who doesn’t think their way), they published a book entitled “Political Correctness: A Short History of Ideology” You may not have heard of the book, but you’ve probably heard of Anders Behring Breivik.

In 2011, Mr. Brevik was the man who bombed government buildings in Oslo, killing 8, and then proceeded to a youth camp where he murdered 69 more, most of whom were teenagers.

Prior to this, Mr. Brevik had written a 1500 page manifesto in which his core thesis was borrowed from the book. He then went out and killed all those people to “market” his manifesto. (I shit you not. That was his explanation.)

What? You’re blaming the FCF for the deaths of all those people? It was just a book, for craps sake! This is the good ol’ USA and we have freedom of speech.

Yes, it was just a book, and then it was just a manifesto, and then someone crossed over the line. (Mentally deranged people have been known to do that.) Yes, this is the United States and yes, we have “freedom of speech” (sort of) But, with freedom comes responsibility. A fact which more than a few people (including the FCF) seem to conveniently forget. And, particularly in this case, there is more than a little responsibility to be shared by the likes of the FCF.

I will say this for the FCF, they not only “talk the talk”, they “walk the walk”, political incorrectness-wise:

  • They’ve hosted dinners honoring “Blowtorch Bob” D’Aubuisson of El Salvadorian death squads fame. (One of Blowtorch’s favorite giggles was tossing babies in the air and shooting them before they hit the ground. And, you can probably guess how he got his nickname.)
  • The FCF distributes homophobic literature by the likes of Dr. Paul Cameron and others.
  • They’ve suggested that Muslims are required to kill non-Muslims.
  • And, of course, being the “patriotic Americans” that they are, they wish the South had won that war so “at least part of North America would still stand for Western culture, Christianity and an appreciation of the differences between ladies and gentlemen.” (I actually agree with them about the South, but for totally different reasons. Mainly, I’m tired of them trying to drag the rest of us down to their level.)

Seems to me with ol’ Jim’s experience running this gaggle of loony tooners, he’s a perfect fit for the ol’ BoD.

A+ John

A+ John

Johnny Nugent

Johnny’s a Repugnut Indiana State Senator hailing from Lawrenceburg, IN, aka Whiskey Town, U.S.A. (Which just might explain a lot.)

Johnny (bless his balding little noggin)  has earned an A+ rating from the NRA.

Just how does one earn an A+ rating? Do you earn it by being a good marksman? Or maybe you’re a strong advocate of gun safety? Or perhaps you prevent a crime by killing someone before he can rob you?

Nah. The NRA hands them out for carrying its water. Which brings us back to Johnny (He may be a Cancerous crab astrologically, but in the real world, he’s an Aquarius.)

Johnny earned his “A+” by:

  • Authoring a bill that makes it a crime for a municipality to enact tougher gun laws than the (Repugnut controlled) state.
  • Introducing a bill that would stop Indiana colleges from banning guns on campus. (That should stop those damn liberal professors from giving out failing grades.)
  • Led opposition to legislation that would have made it illegal for adults to leave a loaded gun where children could have easy access to it. (It’s a good thing kids aren’t fascinated by guns!)

Oh, and before I get off this Aquarian kick, back in D.C., of 435 congresspersons (Is that a word? These days, with “P.C.” running rampant, I can’t keep up.) 242 “bota bags” have earned that coveted “A rating”. On the senate side, there’s 46 of the “little tin buckets”. But, strangest thing, some of them have started to leak.



Jay Printz

By their Facebook page, ye shall know them. At least that’s the case with (ex) sheriff Jay. He is or has been a member of a number of “interesting” FB groups, such as:

  1. SICK of Muslim intimidation – F Mohammed” This one’s an anti-Islam racist site complete with a picture captioned, “Muslim Mothers: Teaching children to become murderers for thousands of years“.
  2. The Unorganized Militia” This one suggests insurrection may be necessary, including making a citizen’s arrest on Obama for “treason”.
  3. Obama’s Healthcare Plan is Unconstitutional” As proof how bad “Obamacare” is, this one backs up its claims by posting a pic of Obama as a witch doctor, complete with a bone in his nose. (If you haven’t seen the pic, it’s posted in “The Tea Potty (pt 4: From Vietnam to Ventura)
  4. Impeach Nancy Pelosi” Not racist, but very sexist, including one pic that Photoshops her into a prostitute. (Naughty, naughty!)
  5. I hate it when I wake up in the morning and Barack Obama is President” This one is just down-right racist. ‘Nuf said.

His own FB page has posted some interesting pics including one of a gun barrel, captioned “Liberals: the only view you need to see“. Or the one captioned: “Liberalism is a mental disease“. Or Bush League & ‘lil Dick waterboarding Pelosi: “I had a dream last night!!

But, he’s not just a FB fanboy. His other favorite site seems to be a bagger blog: American Daughter Media Center. He’s written a number of posts for them, which included such blurbs as “The difference between Obama and Osama is just a little B.S.” In a post on Muslim immigrants in Europe, he called them “plagues that will turn the old continent [Europe] uninhabitable”. A day after Obama was elected he wrote “Well, my friends, it looks like we had better put in a good supply of powder and lead!!!! When they come for your guns…give them your bullets!

Speaking of gun confiscation, he thinks the UN in collaboration with the U.S. is plotting to do just that. “The United Nations is quietly, insidiously planning to strip American citizens of their Second Amendment rights, which are the keystone in the Bill of Rights. Because without the rights of citizens to keep and bear arms, all of the other rights can easily be taken away.

(ex) Sheriff Jay has other interests as well. He was the”Printz” in Printz v. United States, a lawsuit that attempted to void the “Brady Law“. (Well, after all, the NRA said that the law was going to lead to gun confiscation.)

Lies are good for business.

And the shits keep on coming

Ok, it’s take a breath time. (Hmmm……Maybe that wasn’t the best sentence to follow that headline.)

Up to this point, I’ve covered a few of the more notorious BoD members. But, there’s a lot more of them on the board that you may or may not have heard of. Out of 46 board members, I’ve only covered 15 so far.

I don’t want to ignore the rest, but I don’t want to bog down in an already long bio list. Plus, I’m just 500 words shy of 3000 already. (What to do, what to do?)

In perusing these bovine extrusions, you might have noticed that they all seem to list to the right (about 78 – 80 degrees in some cases). I’ve hardly touched (if at all) on their stands on education, environment, immigration, LGBT rights, poverty, religion, voting rights or women’s rights. Mainly because, while they are important, they are not tremendously pertinent to gun rights. Those of you who want more dirt (and in a lot of cases, there’s a lot more) can click their links, and be transported to “Who is the NRA Leadership“, the site where I stole researched a great deal of this material.

There are a couple of issues, however, that are very pertinent and need to be addressed: vigilantism and political violence. Therefore, as I run down the list (with links) to the members, I’ll show you their stands on those issues (if they have any) as well as any other outrageous exhalations. And, to be just a little bit fair (can’t over do it, you know) I’ll point out a few people on the board who, like Sgt Ermey, are not certifiable nut jobs

  • Scott Bach
  • Buster Bachhuber
  • Clel Baudler
  • Ken Blackwell
  • Matt Blunt
  • Dan Boren
  • Pete Brownell
  • John Burtt      John is BoD Chairman of the Fifty Caliber Institute, which claims the .50 caliber sniper rifle (see Ronnie Barrett, above and John Sigler, below) is “helping to make our streets and nation safer“.
  • Dave Butz
  • Richard Childress
  • Patricia Clark
  • David Coy
  • Manny Fernandez     Manny is the founder of Californian’s Against Corruption (which is an interesting title for an organization that was fined a record $808,000 for 404 violations of campaign law). He was later kicked out.                                    What caught my eye, however, was this Manny quote:  “The only reason [the U.S. Government hasn’t] been able to defeat us, it’s not a matter of money, it’s a matter of people. Because we have what they don’t have. We have the people, and in the end, we have the guns.” (Scary words from a man once convicted of criminal possession of a machine gun.)
  • Sandy Froman
  • Marion Hammer
  • Maria Heil
  • Graham Hill
  • Steve Hornady     Steve is the president of Hornady Ammunition (named after his daddy). Among their products for sale to “civilians” are FMJ (Full Metal Jacket) armor piercing bullets. (You know, just in case Bambi’s mom is wearing armor undies.)
  • Roy Innis    Roy’s the current Chairman of Congress of Racial Equality (CORE). A fact that James Farmer, the founder of CORE, isn’t too happy about. Farmer has called Innis “an American Idi Amin” and described CORE as “fraudulent”.         As Mother Jones put it: “CORE is [now] better known among real civil rights groups for renting out its historic name to any corporation in need of a black front person. The group has taken money from the payday-lending industry, chemical giant (and original DDT manufacturer) Monsanto, and ExxonMobil.” Roy’s response to criticism by these and others? “The monies of CORE are my money and CORE is my organization and I’ll run it the way I see fit.”
  • Joaquin Jackson     Joaquin is an ex Texas Ranger and seems pretty much in the R. Lee Ermey category (i.e. no credible evidence of wing-nuttery).
  • Tom King     In 2011 Tom wrote an editorial for the Albany Times-Union, In it, he professed worries about the Muslim extremists who were sneaking across the US-Mexico border. As proof he cited the “Muslim extremist literature and the occasional lost Koran” that have been found on the border. Of course he wrote that despite any evidence of that ever happening. (That’s somewhat akin to Gov. Brewer’s (aka the “Wicked Witch of the SW”) headless border corpses.) Then King complained, “The Obama administration continues to ignore or down play the border threat while continuing his stealth campaign to take our firearms.
  • Herbert Lanford
  • Karl Malone     Yah, that Karl Malone! One of the more moderate board members. He believes that gun ownership is a privilege. The NRA says it’s a “fundamental God-given right“. (Like I said, one of the more moderate members.)
  • Buz Mills
  • Cleta Mitchell
  • Todd Rathner
  • Wayne Anthony Ross
  • Ron Schmeits
  • Tom Selleck     According to Tom, he’s not a “spokesperson for the NRA“. That’s probably a good thing from the NRA’s standpoint. He has “a lot of Libertarian leanings“, but that’s about as non-mainstream as he gets.
  • John Sigler  John’s the President of the Fifty Caliber Institute (see John Burtt and/or Ronnie Barrett) and a past-president of the NRA (2007-2009). He’s pretty typical (for the board) in his views on immigration, gay rights, and of course, the ever popular “they’re coming to take my guns away” conspiracy theory: “Gun registration leads to gun confiscation, as surely as thunder follows lightning.(blah, blah, blah) John’s also not too big on democracy. A couple of years ago, Sigler claimed that the Democrats were plotting to replace the Electoral College with a straight popular vote. Sigler warned that using the popular vote “would lead to rule by tyranny.” The real problem, from the NRA’s perspective, is that such a change would lessen the electoral power of the smaller, more rural (i.e. more pro-gun) states. (Just think, if we’d have had direct presidential elections back in 2000, we wouldn’t have been subjected to 8 years of “Bush League & the Bozos”.)
  • Linda Walker


Well, it looks like I’ve leaped my 3 kiloword (If that wasn’t a word, it is now.) fence again. Therefore, I’ll have to hold the big dawgs at bay for one more episode. Plus, next time around, I’ll get into the inner workings of the once very respectable organization. (I hope!)

Until then, try to stay out of the line of fire. (Those hospital bills are huge.)


p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did.It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

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