Christian Terrorist Threatens to Hang Seven Mayors

Photo Credit: Arkansas Department of Corrections.

Photo Credit: Arkansas Department of Corrections.

Maverick Dean Bryan is a Christian. (Or, is that KKKhristian?) He’s also a convicted felon, the founder (and only known member) of the so-called “First Christian Militia of the USA” and a terrorist as well as a wannabe seditionist. In addition, he’s upset, VERY UPSET!

In fact, he’s so upset that he wrote letters to the mayors of Ashdown, De Queen, Hope, Lewisville, Murfreesboro, Nashville and Prescott, Arkansas threatening to hang them from “mighty oaks” if they don’t do what he tells them to do.

For starters, he’s pissed that schools are teaching common core and not Jesus Christ. (Or at least, his version of J.C.) He wants common core dropped and replaced with the bible. (He neglected to note which version is his preferred choice.)

Also, no more counting votes of any homosexual, Muslim, socialist, communist, atheist, or who worships a God besides Jesus Christ. Not only that, but he wants them kicked out of Arkansas. Oh, and he wants the mayors to hand over their counties to him.

Somehow, I get the feeling that Maverick doesn’t have a clue how things work on this level. Last I heard, mayors don’t run schools, don’t run election boards and don’t run counties. Although, if fairness, maybe they do on Maverick’s planet.

But, Maverick has greater ambitions than just setting Arkansas counties on the road to righteousness. He allegedly wants to kill every living American president, past and present, especially Jimmy Carter.

Not only that, but under the nom de plume of Lt. Gary Owen, he used a local shopper (Thrifty Nickle) to solicit $23,000,000 to overthrow the U.S. government. (Just a loan, mind you. He expected to have no problem repaying it from the spoils of war.)

Local law enforcement is well acquainted with Maverick. He was convicted of interstate motor vehicle theft in 1987 and has been arrested twice since then for possession of firearms. He is currently on probation for being a felon and wearing a .44 caliber pistol in a western style holster. When agents arrested him on March 18th, they found a shotgun in his home. (He seems to think that being in a “militia” trumps the law forbidding felons from firearm possession.)

On the 28th of March, U.S. Magistrate Judge Caroline Craven released him until his trial, however the local District Attorney requested a review of that decision by the U.S. District Court. On May 2nd, Judge Susan Hickey sent him back to jail, stating,

Defendant has an extensive criminal history involving the possession of firearms. In addition to his three previous convictions involving firearms, Defendant has admitted that he was impermissibly in possession of a firearm on the day of his arrest. Thus, Defendant has repeatedly demonstrated his unwillingness to abide by the laws concerning the possession of firearms by a convicted felon. This pattern of disobedience poses a threat to the safety of the community and gives the court little hope that Defendant would abide by any conditions set by this court.

Maverick faces a jury trial later this month. If convicted, he faces fines of up to $250,000 with five years in a federal prison, for each of the seven letters.

Michele Fiore: Taking Up Arms Against The Government Is Acceptable (VIDEO)

FioreGun1-1024x596Miss Michele Bachmann’s batty brain-dead banter? Swoon over silly Sarah Palin’s slurry, sappy syntax? Have I got a bumble-headed bimbo for you! Meet Michele Fiore! This ding-bat (with apologies to ding-bats everywhere) is soooo far out there that she makes the previous two ladies sound like Al Einstein and Steve Hawking rolled into one.

Michele is an assemblywoman in Nevada, the state that gave us such female political filberts as Sue (Pay your doctor with a chicken) Lowden and Sharron (2nd Amendment Remedy) Angle. PostCards_6x9_CS

She is currently campaigning for a promotion to the U.S. House of Representatives.

I first ran across Michele (Only figuratively, unfortunately.) a little over a year ago when she shook up the medical profession (with side-stitching laughter) with her discovery of the cause and sure-fire remedy for cancer.

If you have cancer, which I believe is a fungus, and we can put a pic line into your body and we’re flushing with, say, salt water, sodium cardonate ([sic] through that line and flushing out the fungus. These are some procedures that are not FDA-approved in America that are very inexpensive, cost-effective.

(For you non-chemistry majors, her miracle cure of sodium cardonate is commonly called washing soda. It’s used as a water softener.)

A little while later, she came up with another sure-fire cure. This time for campus rapes. As she explained it to the New York Times,

If these young, hot little girls on campus have a firearm, I wonder how many men will want to assault them. The sexual assaults that are occurring would go down once these sexual predators get a bullet in their head.

Then last December she sent out a Christmas card that truly evoked the spirit of the holiday.merryfiore2(Need I mention that Michele is a “2nd Amendment” ammosexual of the first water?)

Just last month, Michele inserted herself in the news cycle  when she traveled up Oregon way to give aid and comfort to the Bundy bozos in their patriotic quest to free a bird refuge for commercial exploitation. She even hung around and held their hand as they were hauled off to the hoosegow.

After she got back down to Nevada, she explained to the “Las Vegas Sun” that she didn’t see what the big deal was, the refuge occupiers were just camping out.

It was abandoned. No one was there, so they basically kind of said, This is a great place to camp and make our statement.

When confronted with a list of illegal acts that were perpetrated, she wasn’t buying it.

I’d need to see some proof. Somebody would need to show me.

Michele had been involved with the Bundys before. She was a supporter of Cliven Bundy in his fight to keep from paying $1,000,000 in fees for grazing rights on government land, which led to the Bundy Ranch Standoff (aka the “Battle of Bunkerville“).Bundy & BimboShe also told the “Sun” that if provoked, taking up arms against the government was perfectly acceptable.

If the government is going to point a gun at me, I’m going to point one right back. If you’re going to shoot me, I’m going to shoot you back.

The reporter then asked her if the occupation of the refuge was acceptable, what about occupying other government buildings such as congress or the White House. She evaded giving a direct answer, only commenting that the White House was surrounded by gates to keep people out.

Stay tuned!