Trump’s Love of Gold Extends to Showers? Who Knew?

Donald_Trump_by_Gage_Skidmore_2Oh, dem golden showers Oh dem golden showers

Dem golden showers I’se goin’ to take Because they get me off.*

*With apologies to James K Bland. (Writer of “Golden Slippers”)

Believe it or not, writing rants and raves requires a bit of research. (I don’t mind if my snarks misfire, but I HATE it if my facts do.)

Some days, when I’m trying to sift through sites like “Brietbart,” Trunews,” or “InfoWars,” it’s like trying to find a needle in a shitstack. Other days, Mother Google alone, will shower me with a plethora of golden goodies. This has been one of those days. (The latter, not the former.)

As you’ve probably heard, unless you’ve been living on that asteroid that barely missed earth last Monday (1/9/16), Donald Trump (aka “Herr Rump, aka “Duh Fuhrer-to-be”) has reportedly been engaging in some naughty, naughties with several Soviet strumpets.

He’s accused of a lot of other nefarious acts, some of which border on TREASON! (Some may even sneak over the border.) However, humanity being what humanity is, it’s the sexual highjinks (lowjinks?) that have hit the headlines. (This one included.)

Since political, religious and sexual picadillos are my passion, (as well as great fodder for posts) I decided to throw my cent and a half worth in.

As I inferred before, research on this was easy peasy! Here’s what I mean:15940786_1579009972112697_127471616537975328_n“trump supporters regret voting for him”

This one got about 1,220,000 results in 0.50 seconds. Of course there are a lot of causes for voter regret and a lot of them have nothing to do with whizzing. (Come to think about it, I wonder if that’s how he maintains his “golden glow.”) Several of these references go back days or weeks.

“trump shower pee”

This one might be a bit confusing because he didn’t pee in the shower. (At least, not that I know of. And, to be honest, I don’t want to “know of.”) He was showered on the bed, which gives a whole new dimension to “wet the bed.”

“trump pee”

This one brought up a number of interesting headlines, including my favorite: “Golden showers’ rain on Trump’s victory parade in a pee-for-all scandal

“gopocalypse”

Lest you think I snuck this one in to keep my boss happy…..(Well, actually, I did.) Although, we did do a post on it a couple days ago.

“trump pee party”

This was used in the headlines of a number of posts. Not sure if that was the best they could think of, or they were Lewis Carroll fans.

“did trump pee on hookers?”

Questions in headlines always draw more clicks. (That’s one reason I used two in mine.) However, as far as I know, it was the other way around. This falls under misleading, and to be honest, I’m not a big fan of “misleading.”

“trump pee pants”

I’m not sure about that. Maybe he depends on “Depends.” Interestingly, (at least to me) this brought up a link to GOPocalypse’s aforementioned post: The Top 15 Responses To Trump’s Golden Shower Bombshell That Will Surely Make You Pee A Little Too

“donald trump pee in hotel”

As much as I don’t mind being unfair to Herr Rump, this one pushes it a bit. I mean, haven’t we all peed in a hotel?

“keith olbermann trump video”

Not quite sure if this was a good search inquiry. Keith does videos about Trump a couple times a week lately.

Anyway, all this should give you a sample of the various search terms used to pursue the salacious details. (Not to mention, give me a post of approximately 600 words.)

In parting, let me leave you with the immortal words of my grandpappy:

It’s better to be pissed off, than pissed on!