Fruitcake: One Third Of The Government Is Involved In A Satanic Pedophile Ring

A “satanic pedophile ring?” And a third of the government is involved?

That’s either the hottest news story in decades, someone is seriously off their meds again, or maybe they’re just fishing for money and using bullshit for bait! (My money is on Door #3!)

There’s big Benjamins to be earned on the “I Hate Hillary and/or Obama” Circuit. (Not to mention, book sales to the “It’s hard reading words with over four letters” crowd.)

Right now, you’re probably asking yourself, “Where do they find these imbeciles?

Meet Liz Crokin!

Lizzy is a minor leaguer trying to break into the “bigs” by outlandishing the competition. She’s been a volunteer or intern for “Great ‘Muricans,” like George “Duh” Bush (aka: “Bush League”) and Billo (“the Clown”) O’Reilly. She now writes for WorldNetDaily (aka: “WeirdNutsDrooling”).

Lizzy got a bit of attention back in May when she claimed that it wasn’t up to conspiracy theorists to prove anything. It was up to the anti-conspiracy theorists to prove them wrong!

If you want to debunk a story, a conspiracy theory, you have to prove evidence that X, Y, and Z isn’t true and no one does that! This isn’t the conspiracy theory defense. I’m sorry, it’s not going to fly anymore.

Sounds logical. (If your height in inches is a larger number than your IQ.)

Nowadays she’s into that whole “PizzaGate” thingy. You know, the one where the Big Bad Democrats had this hole….excuse me, whole child-sex thing going on in places that were masquerading as restaurants, pizza joints and bookstores. Oh yeah, and Hillary headed it!

Some people believed all this bullshit. (According to one poll, taken at the time, 9% of Americans really are that stupid!) Included in that exclusive group is ex-National Security Advisor, Mike Flynn (of Russian collusion fame).

In fact, one guy, whose nose hairs outnumbered his IQ, walked into Comet Ping Pong (Sex Slave Central?) with his loaded AR-15 type rifle to do a bit of “self-investigating.” While there, he “self-investigated” three bullets into a wall. (If he was aiming at people, he shoots like he thinks. If he was aiming at the wall, at least he managed to hit it.) He later stated that he “found no evidence that underage children were being harbored in the restaurant.”

As an award for his adventure, he got a 4 year vacation at the Iron Bar Inn. Plus, he had to pay for damages to Comet Ping Pong. That bill came to $5744.33 ($1914.78 per bullet hole).

But, back to our gal, Lizzy.

Though a “Lizzy-come-lately” to the PizzaGate fun and games, she brought out some heavy artillery! (Does that qualify as a mixed metaphor? Sometimes I like to mix and match them.)

In the early part of July, she exploded a bombshell! (…….Ok, so it was more like a fire cracker.) It seems (to Lizzy) that not only were these perverted, child-sex-lovers doing unmentionable things to poor sweet innocents, they were also a bunch of murderous thugs!

On “The Hagmann and Hagmann Report,” she claimed that they had put a hit on Rep. Steve Scalise.

Scalise, I truly believe, was specifically targeted in the Alexandria shooting, I believe it was a hit because of his work with sex trafficking!

If you start taking the microscope under these people that are speaking out the loudest against [Jeff] Sessions, Scalise and [President] Trump, you will find many, many ties to pedophilia.

Is it a coincidence that he was just starting to push for legislation to end human trafficking? I don’t think so. And we damn well know the Podesta emails, that those emails are filled with pedophile code words. Connect the dots.

Oh, and her proof? (I’m so glad you asked!) The Democrats sent pizzas to Scalise’s staff, just to rub it in!

And, as they say in old infomercials, “But wait! There’s more!

More specifically, more utter MORONity!

You may (I hope!) remember back a few paragraphs when I mentioned that this salacious, sex syndicate was populated by Hillary and her Democratic Elite Henchpersons. (That kinda sounds like a really bad lesbian grunge band.)

Well, (alternate) truth be told, it’s much bigger than that. In fact, you might even call it YUGE! (You might! I never would!)

Just last week, Lizzy went on Dave Hodges’ “The Common Sense Show,” to share her latest tinfoil hairnet slippage. That nasty, vile, and may I say,  very naughty, Democrat O&O (Owned and Operated) pedophile syndicate has GONE GLOBAL! (A true American success story!)

The leadership now consists of big wigs of various governments, corporate captains and kinky celebs.

Not only that, but “one-third of the government” is part of this. However, don’t get your “Sponge Bobs” all bunched up. There’s a reason for that: It comes with their membership in the satanic Illuminati cult that runs the operation. (I hear the numbers in the Child Protection Departments are exceptionally high.)

And, they not only play “Fun-between-the-Buns” with their little “lovers,” the also kill and eat them. (I think the ritual is called “The Sexy Praying Mantis,” but I could be wrong.) They also drink their blood.

The raping of children and the drinking of blood, this is a ritual they do, this is their religion, this is how they believe they obtain power. That is very hard for people to believe, but we did learn from the Podesta emails, that is exactly what is going on.

She neglected to comment on which were the most savory parts (I’m a “breast guy” myself. Or maybe a baby rib eye.) or even how to cook them. (Maybe they like ’em tartare.) However, that does explain the resturants and pizza joints.

That’s very hard for the public to process, so President Trump and his people understand that they can’t just come out one day and be like, ‘Oh hey, one third of the government is raping children and sacrificing them and drinking their blood and they’re satanists.’ You just can’t drop that bomb on people; people can’t process that information like that, they need it in doses, they need to be conditioned. So what we have going on behind the scenes is that … the Trump administration is slowly trying to condition the public and try to prepare them for what’s about to go down.

Whew! For a minute there, I was soooo worried. I didn’t know Duh Fuhrer was on the case!

He’ll get to the bottom of these sex-crazed killers and drinkers of baby blood. And, you know dang well he’ll bring his yuge twitter paddle with him when he gets there. It’s VERY bigly! It takes two hands to operate. (Well, two Trump hands, anyway.)

Stay tuned!

Grouchy

p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

Wingnut Declares War On Witches Attacking The Trumps

Cotton Mather Lives! (Or, at least his superstitious stupidity does.)

Over the last year or so, a number of troglodyte “Khristians” (As opposed to “Christian,” which they ain’t!) have seen witches coming out of the woodwork.

Last fall, a Family Research Council member, Robert Maginnis, visited Jim Bakker to spread the alarm.

I have personally met people that refer to themselves as witches, people that say they advise the senior leadership of the country. We invite within the federal government people to advise us and often some of those advisers, I think, have evil motivations, things that you and I would not approve of.

And then in February, everybody’s least favorite crazy uncle, Pat Robertson, piped in.

I read that a bunch of witches have gotten together to put a curse on Trump, and I think the Christians need to be praying for him to defend him.

Pat’s Co-Hostess, Wendy Griffith stated that “probably millions” of Christians are praying to cancel out the witches curses. She didn’t mention the “probably millions” of Americans that are praying that Trump will rot in Hell!

In June, warnings started surfacing about witches brewing something up for Summer Solstice.

Rumor had it that the majority of witches were students from Uadaguo [Wag-a-do], the African wizarding school and the event was hosted by its American counterpart, Ilvermorny. There are also unconfirmed sightings of several Hogwarts alumni, including Hermione Weasley. (Just kidding(?) about this part.)

With this cat-ass-trophy on the horizon, the president of Intercessors for America (IFA) issued an urgent call to prayer about this abhorent sacrilege. (And, he knows a thing or three about sacrilege.)

Whether or not this call for spells pans out and people act on it, we feel compelled, as the body of Christ and intercessors, to come against this evil with immediate and powerful prayer.

At one point, a pair of Roman Catholic female eunuchs even outed Katy Perry as a witch. Some unbelievers called this “

Some unbelievers called this “nunsense.” I mean, Katy may get a bit “out there” at times, but I’ve never seen her in proximity of a broom.

On the other hand, just look at all the adolescent males she’s cast a spell on.

Which brings us to the latest (But, not the greatest.) tinfoil slippage about the witchery situation.

Khristian bible beater and Rump licker extraordinaire, Lance Wallnau, has had enough of these witch curses. Lance claims that Rump is ok because sooo many people are praying for him. Besides, Lance has already prayed the impeachment away.

Oh, and Rump is already safe from a stroke as well. A few days ago, he watched fellow troglodyte, Rodney Howard Brown, pray it away.

The devil is trying to get him and his family. And I heard Rodney Howard-Browne say when he laid hands on the president, he was worried there was a stroke coming; well, we veto that stroke in Jesus’ name! That is nothing but stress and we’re breaking it off of him right now.

So, Rump is all prayed-safe, but think of poor Bevis & Butthead, Jarhead, and the rest of family.

Photo Credit: mccauleys-corner

 

 

 

 

 

People are praying for the president, but they’re not necessarily praying for his family. So right now, all those witchcraft curses that did not land on Donald Trump are trying to take out his kids, trying to take out his offspring, trying to attack anything near him.

He knows this for a fact, because he’s seen it before.

Lance remembered when a bud of his was “casting a demon out of somebody” while driving down the highway and the demon jumped right into a dog. The dog jumped out of the car and with the aid of an oncoming vehicle, morphed into a freeway flapjack!

He then went on to state,

We take authority over every hex, vex, spell, jinx, satanic curse, blood curse, every demon assigned to destroy the health of the president, to destroy the health of his family, to harass him, to vex him, to cause him to lose sleep.

In Jesus name, we veto every curse that has been brought against Donald Trump and his family and his administration.

Stay tuned!

Grouchy

h/t: Right Wing Watch
p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

Wingnut: Stop Funding Planned Parenthood And God Will Heal All Disease (Video)

Gordon Klingenschmitt is one of those “Khristian” (As opposed to “Christian,” which he ain’t!) troglodytes that gets the eminations of his oral and anal cavities mixed up!

I won’t go deep into his history, (If you want to, start here!) other than to mention that he was a chaplin in the navy, built a “ministry” around a lie about his court martial that got him kicked out, and then found enough stupid people in Colorado to elect him to office. Although, even they weren’t stupid enough to elect him again. (He lost in the primary.)

Since then he’s back with his ministry and a regular on the “Pepe the Frog” circuit. Oh, and he has a program, ironically named “Pray in Jesus Name,” even though, where J.C. preached love, he preaches hate!

On his program last week, he weighed in on the Senate battle over its “DeathCare” bill. According to Gordo-head, we don’t need no stinking bill. All we have to do is make the government quit funding Planned Parenthood abortions and the “Guy in the sky” will “heal your diseases.”

He claims the politicians fighting to keep Planned Parenhood abortion funding “are being influenced by a demonic spirit because they want to kill children with your taxpayer dollars” Of course, almost every group that Gordo-head doesn’t like is, according to him, influenced by demonic spirits.

For instance:

  • The Disney Corp for making “Beauty & the Beast(The movie was made to turn kids gay.);
  • ABC TV for creating a show with a gay minister (Heaven forbid, or at least, Gordo-head forbid.);
  • Gays (Of course!);
  • The Supreme Court (I did a post on that a couple of years ago.);
  • And ex-President Obama! (You knew that one was coming!)

There’s a whole bunch more, but you get the idea.

Back to his latest oral bowel movement:

You know what the solution to America’s healthcare crisis is? Obey the Ten Commandments, stop funding abortion, stop funding child killing and God will heal your diseases, America. The supernatural blessing of healing is available if we stop working with the demonic spirit of murder…we would receive [Big Daddy’s] healing and wouldn’t need to rely on socialist healthcare.

A couple of inconvenient “truth bombs” that either G-h is to ignorant to be aware of, or just get in the way of his rants:

  1. THERE IS NO FEDERAL FUNDING FOR ABORTIONS! Whether it’s to Planned Parenthood or Joe’s All Night Garage and Fetus Killing Palace!
  2. There are a number of countries where abortions are illegal and I haven’t noticed Big D jumping in and curing all their diseases.

But, then again, what is truth to a bozo that makes his bucks selling hate and lies?

Stay tuned!

Grouchy
p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

Wingnut Preacher: Trump ‘Receives Downloads’ From God

Everybody’s (not-so) favorite ex-con/current con artist, Jim Bakker, loves to have fellow filberts on his Survivalist Infomercial (aka “The Jim Bakker Show“). This week, one of the guests was a Khristian (as opposed to “Christian”) bible-beater named Frank Amedia.

For those of you fortunate enough not to have run across Mr. Ameia, he’s a self-anointed “apostle” who claims to have single-handedly stopped waves from the 2011 tsunami in Japan from hitting a Hawaiian island. (King Canute is spinning in his grave.)

I stood at the edge of my bed and I said, ‘In the name of Jesus, I declare that tsunami to stop now.’ And I specifically said, ‘I declare those waters to recede.’

He’s also a self-proclaimed profit….er, “prophet.” and joined other profits (Damn! Did it again.) prophets, to create a “POTUS Shield.” After all, Trump was (according to these nut jobs)God’s Guy,” annointed by Big Daddy hisownself. (I wonder what grade of crude oil, B.D. used?)

Well, I gotta tell ya, this bit of butt bussing impressed Trump (aka Herr Rump) sooo much that he made Frank and some of the gang, Official Trump “Christian policy liaisons.”

Anyway, as I said earlier, Frank and fellow flibert, Jim, got to gether this week so that Frank could regale us with his tales of Trump prophecies that slipped through his tinfoil toupee.

Among the tales was one of Big D. oiling (Did he use Exon oil?) up Herr Rump with a “Breaker Anointment,” so that Rump could break up things. You know, like the Republican and Democratic parties, as well as the news media. (Other than the Bullshit Mtn variety, of course.)

So, watch out, Kim Jong-un, YHWH’s “Breaker-in-Chief” is on the loose and looking at you!

So, you know, North Korea, you’d better be on your toes because you’re up against a breaker anointing of God. This isn’t about politics, this isn’t government as usual, this isn’t even militaristic, God has raised up…a breaker anointing. Anything that God opposes him against, he breaks up. He broke up the Republican Party…he broke up the Democratic Party, he broke up the news media. Everything that comes against him, he has a hammer against. So, I’m telling you, North Korea, you’d better stand down because you’re up against the breaker anointing of God.

Frank also had a few things to say about Herr Rumps fave-o-rite night-time activity: tweeting. According to Frank the twit’s tweets are part of the “gift of wisdom” that Elohim (Another of the Big Guy’s many aliases.) gave the Trumpster. Besides, because of Herr Rump’s “God-given gift of discernment,” being Prexy is a boring job and our pear-less leader needs distraction.

I believe he receives downloads that now he’s beginning to understand come from God.

(I have to wonder if Frank isn’t getting the “guy in the sky” and Putin confused.)

Stay tuned! (Or not.)

Grouchy

h/t: Right Wing News

Featured Image Credit: YouTube screen grab
p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

Pat Robertson: If You Find Trump Revolting, You’re Revolting Against God! (Video)

Crazy Uncle Pat is at it again! Never one to let a controversy go by unscathed, the poster child(?) for senility weighed in on “The Russian Connection” scandal.

Ignoring the fact that Flynn’s phone calls to the Russian Ambassador boarded on, or over, the treason line, Robertson, claimed the intelligence community was out to get Flynn. According to Uncle Pat, they were specifically monitoring Flynn’s phone calls.

Actually, U.S. intelligence agencies routinely monitor the communications of Russian diplomats. The problem for Flynn is that the then future National Security Advisor didn’t know enough about national security to know that.

Robertson doesn’t believe the intelligence agencies were going rogue to pick on Flynn. Not by the hair on your chinny, chin chin! The instigators of the plot were the usual suspects (of the tinfoil turban crowd). It was Democrats, liberal government officials and (of course) the media.

Let me tell you! Uncle Pat had more than a few things to say about that and the “grand conspiracy” to bring down Trump and his crew. For starters, he pulled out the “good(?) book.”

The kings of the earth rise up and the rulers band together against the Lord and against his anointed,” Robertson said that those challenging Trump are really fighting against God. – Psalm 2:2

Then, of course, he added his own twisted take on the situation.

I think, somehow, the Lord’s plan is being put in place for America and these people are not only revolting against Trump, they’re revolting against what God’s plan is for America. These other people have been trying to destroy America. These left-wingers and so-called progressives are trying to destroy the country that we love and take away the freedoms they love. They want collectivism. They want socialism. What we’re looking at is free markets and freedom from this terrible, overarching bureaucracy. They want to fight as much as they can but I think the good news is the Bible says, “He that sits in the heavens will laugh them to scorn,” and I think that Trump’s someone on his side that is a lot more powerful than the media.

Well, if it was Big Daddy’s plan to inflict Trump upon this country, he must be mighty pissed at us about something.

In parting, for your listening and dancing delight, I present a minute and 23 seconds of this insanity. Enjoy!

Was Flynn Forced Out By ‘Devil-Worshiping, Luciferian, Demon-Possessed Maniacs?’

Heronimus BoschWelcome to the weird, warped, wacky world of Rick Wiles. This is a world straight out of the fever dream of John of Patmos or maybe Hieronymus Bosch. The Rickster runs a nut-job radio program called “Trunews.” (“Tru”, it ain’t and as for “news,” it would only be that if he ever got anything right.) 

In the past, he has regaled us with such knee-slappers as,

Yesterday (2/14/17) on his show, the Rickster had another brain fart. (Either that or his tinfoil toupee slipped off again.)

Rick Wiles shares the disturbing mechanics behind the spiritual melee currently in full swing for control of President Trump’s cabinet and the fate of Christianity worldwide. Rick also discusses the mad ramblings echoing through the Democratic party, and reminds the audience of the communist origins behind the revolt for America’s soul.

I’m running low on Emetrol, so I’m just going to cover a portion of the program. If you’ve stocked up, click on the “show” link above. (RDT not responsible for any mental or medical malfunctions resulting from listening to his ravings.)

Here’s a short run-down of some of the bovine meadow muffins from the show:

  • Flynn was dumped because he knew about Hillary’s child molestation ring. (Can you say “Pizzagate.”) Of course, that only existed in the fevered brows of the Tinfoil Turban set, but hey, why let a thoroughly debunked conspiracy go to waste?
  • Devil-worshiping, Luciferian, demon-possessed maniacs” have formed a “criminal cabal [that is] running this nation and much of the world” that allows them to engage in “child trafficking, child molestation, child rape, [and] child murder.
  • Many of the key officials, elected and appointed, and in corporate board rooms and in Hollywood and in New York City, they are part of a global child molestation ring,”
  • Hillary is now “relishing in the fact that they brought down General Flynn because he knows what they are and what they’re doing.”

Here’s a short clip from the program. Hopefully, a small dose won’t be too lethal.

I’d say “stay tuned,” but I’m not that much of a sadist.

Featured Image Credit: Wikimedia Commons

Right-Wing Preacher Proclaims Trump Is ‘God’s New Samson’ (AUDIO)

Sansone_distrugge_il_tempio_dei_Filistei_-_GrechettoIn the latest news from the Theocracy of Tinfoil Turbans comes word that Donald Trump, aka “Herr Rump,” aka “Duh Fuhrer,” may indeed be the second coming of Samson.

No, not the circus strongman, this one’s the real deal. The one from the “good book,” Judges 13-15.

Now, the last word I heard was that Herr Rump was the 2nd coming of John the Baptist, or maybe even J.C., himself! At least that’s what ex Assembly of God bible thumper, Tom Horn, told Jim Bakker last month.

Maybe Horn was wrong or maybe Duh Fuhrer has a case of multiple personality disorder, amidst his many other mental maladies.

Anyway, Rick Wyles thinks he’s Samson. No word on who Rick thinks Delilah is this time around.

For those of you who have not had the displeasure of knowing Rick, he’s another troglodyte “Khristian,” as opposed to “Christian.” He’s also the host of the “end times” and survivalist themed radio program, “Trunews.” Despite its name, Trunews is not news and is definitely not true.

I’ve written about Rick a couple times in the past. In May of 2015, Rick predicted death and destruction if SCOTUS legalized gay marriage.

Claiming the Holy Ghost was speaking through him, he said there was fire in the future. The Sacred Spook wasn’t sure if it was rioting, war or a fireball from space, but it was something.

America will be brought to its knees, there will be pain and suffering at a level we’ve never seen in this country. The word that I hear in my spirit is ‘fire.’ I do not know if it refers to riots or looting or war on American soil or a fireball from space. I simply know that a sweeping, consuming fire will come across the United States of America and this country will be charred and burned.

Herr Rump was elected, so maybe he was right on that one.

Then last February, after Justice Scalia bit the big one, Rick claimed he was the victim of a pagan sacrifice.

He broke the news to the world that Obama murdered Scalia as part of Lupercalia. Lupercalia, for those of you not hip to pagan holidays is supposed to avert evil spirits, releasing health and fertility. More than that, this ritual sacrifice also marked the beginning of the country being ruled by our pagan fascist overlords.

Hmm, once again, was he predicting Duh Fuhrer?

This Wednesday (1/25/17) Rick was as happy as a tick gorging on an elephant’s butt.

Friends, listen to me,” he said. “God’s favor is on us. Please, please, please comprehend what is happening. It’s more than a political revolution. This is a spiritual revolution. God’s favor is shining on us. I can’t get out of my mind what Mario Murillo said Monday, ‘Grace is oozing out of Heaven.’ It’s just oozing towards us right now. I’m basking in it. I’m rolling around in it. I’m enjoying it

He went on to explain the cause of his euphoria,

I keep getting this picture that Donald Trump is like this Samson, who has been raised up by God to fight the Philistines and all the Philistines have now turned their attention away from the church, turned their attention away from attacking Christianity, and all of the Philistines are running to Washington to attack Samson. But Samson is strong enough for them. He’s been called. He’s been equipped for this battle. That is his job. That is his assignment. He’s going to beat them down. They will not be able to overtake him. He’s Samson. He was designed by God. He was created for this hour to fight these Philistines.

By “Philistines,” I’m not sure if he was talking about the Women’s March on Washington, the fact-checking press, the LGBT community, some descendants of the original Philistines, or just the majority of Americans in general. He  was a bit vague on the matter.

But, in his “Us Against Them War,” the “Philistines,” whoever they are, are the enemy!

Deranged Jim Bakker Is Sure Trump Is BFF With Jesus–Will Fight Evil Women Who Kill Babies

Jim Bakker, for those of you who don’t keep up with troglodyte bible-thumpers, is a lecherous, larcenist, preacher, who spent a few years learning the finer points of “rock hockey” after being caught for his misdeeds. In 1989,he was sentenced to 45 years in the  “Stony Lonesome,” but he wrangled a sentence reduction and only served five.

Since his release, he’s back at the old con shop, mostly pushing apocalyptic visions of the future and selling survival food and gear. (Of course, if you’re “raptured,” it’s a waste of money.)

To push his predictions, products and profits, he has an online broadcast (The Jim Bakker Show), with guests like Rick Wyles, Rick Joyner, Mike Huckabee and Carl Gallups.

In fact, Mr. Gallups was a guest on last Monday’s (1/16/16) show.

Carl Gallups has all the standard right-wing filbert credentials: He’s anti-gay, claiming it will completely destroy society and lead to enslavement.

He’s against Common Core, because, in his words,

Under Common Core, our smallest children in pre-school, kindergarten, etc. will learn about “the mechanics of homosexual sex because it has now been deemed normal and natural.

He’s also a “Sandy Hook Truther” claiming that the whole thing was a government hoax to justify new firearm restrictions and the grieving parents were actors.

Is it any wonder that Trump said Gallup’s endorsement was a “great honor” during the campaign?

As I said, on Monday Bakker had Gallup as a guest on his show. During their discussion, Bakker went off the deep end (again). He claimed that a million women are getting ready to march (Women’s March on Washington) because they want to kill their babies. They also want to kill Trump, because he’s leading the battle against evil. If they do that,they’re free to “sin.”

During the program, we also found out that Trump is a “born again” Christian (If that’s true, I want to see his “re-birth certificate.”) and has been ministered to for 15 years in preparation for the presidency.

Then Gallup piped in that the “demonic powers” (aka “Globalists“) are freaking out over the possibility that Trump may be president for 8 years, followed by Pence for another 8 and Trump’s son Eric taking over after that. (Hell, if that were a possibility, everybody should be freaking out!)

If you have enough Emetrol handy, here’s a clip of the proceedings:

Does Trump’s CIA Director Want To Start A Holy War?

This threat to America is from people who deeply believe that Islam is the way and the light and the only answer. These folks believe that it is religiously driven for them to wipe Christians from the face of the earth…. They abhor Christians, and will continue to press against us until we make sure that we pray and stand and fight and make sure that we know that Jesus Christ our savior is truly the only solution for our world. – Mike Pompeo, Trump’s pick for CIA Director

The above quote was part of a speech Representative Mike Pompeo, (R-Kansas) gave to a church group in Wichita, Kansas, in 2014.

While Pompeo did not come out and directly advocate declaring war on Islam, there were several embedded “dog whistles,” (Conveniently denoted in boldface.) to get the message across. Such as: “It is religiously driven for them to wipe Christians from the face of the earth,” “make sure that we pray and stand and fight” and “Jesus Christ our savior is truly the only solution for our world.

That last one is especially troubling. Allow me to translate down the audio spectrum: “Christianity should rule the world or we’re in deep doo-doo.”

Don’t think that the Wichita speech was a “one off.” Last year, he addressed the Summit Church in his home district. This particular church  specializes in Satanism and paranormal activity. In that speech, he called the fight against radical Islam “the kind of struggle this country has not faced since its great wars.

So, who the hell is Mike Pompeo? For starters, he’s a former army captain that thinks he knows more about military matters than the Pentagon, State Department and Obama. He’s currently been nominated to head the CIA by Donald Trump.

You might remember him as part of the Benghazi witch hunt, looking for Hillary Clinton’s “smoking gun.” (Or at least, her broomstick.) Mike never found the gun, but he still managed to shoot himself in the foot.

As you might guess, being elected in Kansas, Mike flies with his right wing only. He pushes a number of fantasies cherished by troglodytes.

As bad as these things may be, they don’t have a lot to do with his proposed position at the CIA. But, these do:

“Why would you spy on friends? Because it’s a place where you find people who are trying to do enormous harm to America.”

  • He also thinks the N.S.A. needs to spy on American citizens. (Can you say “Big Brother is Watching?”)
  • He’s a torture fanboy. Despite the fact that torture hardly ever results in actionable intelligence. Not to mention that it’s against national and international laws.
  • He’s “skeptical” about global climate change. (See “fossil fuels” comment above.) This despite the fact that the Department of Defense asserts that climate change will affect the Pentagon’s ability to “defend the nation” and “poses immediate risks to U.S. national security.”
  • As you may have noticed, he’s an Islamophobe. Not a good position to hold when trying to deal with the ongoing series of Middle East Crises. (Not to mention, it destroys the myth of American impartiality when it comes to negotiations.)
  • Pompeo belongs to a group, (Member’s Bible Study) who’s illustrious members, past and present, include Jeff Sessions, Michele Bachmann, Steve King, Louie Gohmert and Mike Pence. The group is lead by Ralph Drollinger, an anti-LGBT clergyman who has called Catholicism the “world’s largest false religion.”

Referring to Pence, Sessions, and Pompeo, Dollinger stated,

Suddenly these men who have been discipled by the Church are in prominent positions of authority to change the course of America in ways that are biblical.

(Yeah, the “Revelations” part of the bible!)

Stay tuned!

Featured Image credit: Gage Skidmore

 

 

Confessions of a ‘Demon Possessed’ Progressive

Yes folks, evidently, somewhere within my inner being, there dwelleth a demon. What kind of demon, I’m not sure. It can’t be an Incubus  because I haven’t gotten laid in ages. Maybe it’s Beelzebub. I’ve always considered myself to be a “fallen angel.”

Don’t get me wrong. I am not a subscriber to any of the “Current Prevailing Mythologies,” although I think Zoroastrianism is a hoot! (Jews and Early Christians must have thought so as well, since they adopted so much of it.)

I am not an Agnostic. Agnostics are really just “Chicken Atheists”.

I’m a “real, live, full-blown, fire-breathing Atheist” complete with horns and a tail.dragon-253539_1280-1080x654OK, I exaggerated a little on that last bit. I am real and I am alive (at least the last time I checked). I am full (especially around dinnertime), but I haven’t been blown in ages. Also, my breath may be a mite odoriferous, but it isn’t really incendiary. (The breath from my nether “mouth” is another matter altogether.) And, the closest I get to “horns and a tail” is being horny for some tail. (Boy, am I gonna hear from the “Fems” on that one.)

However, despite my disbelief in things that go “Woo Woo” in the night, it seems I’ve been infected by one of the Woo-Wooers. At least that’s what court-marshaled and kicked out, ex Navy chaplain, Gordon Klingenschmitt, claims.

It seems I’ve had the temerity to criticize Gordon in the past. It all started back in May of 2015. At that time, Mr K wasn’t too tickled about SCOTUS refusing to hear a challenge to New Jersey’s law, banning conversion therapy.

Of course, he knew exactly why they took that awful position. SCOTUS was cooperating with demonic spirits. Upon learning about that, I decided to research and write a post on the matter.

Over the following months, I’ve had occassions to revisit this loony toon. I mean, how could I pass up a filbert who claims that the FCC lets demonic spirits molest and visually rape children.

Well, (And, you may notice a thread running through all this.) criticizing this crackpot brought on a bad case of demon possession.

Le’ me ‘splain, or rather, lat the Colorado Coo Coo ‘splain.

On a recent Pray in Jesus Name program, Mr K revisited his favorite theme:

There is a demonic spirit of persecution in the world. They all hate Christians and they want to silence us and they want to accuse us and they want to falsely attribute words to us that we never said and then they want to twist our words to claim that we are the haters, that we are the criminals for simply exposing their evil.

He went on to claim that Christians that tell the truth are “going to stir up some angry demons inside of your opposition.

That doesn’t mean the Christians are wrong. It means there is something inside of those other people that was there before we came and now it’s getting angry because it is being exposed and that is the demonic spirit.

Problem is, Gordon Klingenschmitt is NOT a “Christian!” He’s what I term a “Khristian.” Christ never taught the bullshit this anal pit spews. In fact, a good percentage of his oral bowel movements are antithetical to Christ’s teachings. (Yes folks, like most of you, I spent my childhood going to Sunday School.)

That, (at least according to him) still leaves me with my possession problem. I’m not into exorcisms, but I wonder if a good strong dose of Ipecac would work?

Speaking of medicine, if you’ve got some Emetrol handy, here’s the program segment:

Shameless Plug #1: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”). You might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

Shameless Plug #2: If you happen to be connected to a major progressive news site, I’m looking for a gig. One that allows me to be me. (I have a hell of a hard time being someone else.) If you are such a person, give me a buzz over on “Grouchy’s Grumbles.”