As I’ve stated before, this is not an award for stupidity. (Rump winning every week would quickly get boring.) Rather, the award is for the crackpotiest of the crackpots. Those individuals, that for one reason or another, don’t don their tinfoil toupees to block the brain waves emanating from Planet Nibiru.
Due to the holiday, the wacky traffic was down a bit this past week, but some insanity still seeped through. A couple of constant contenders doubled down and a refugee from the 14th Century made the finals.
This week’s nominees are:
- Rick Wiles for explaining why angels don’t hang around earth anymore. (Gay dudes would rape them.);
- Alex Jones for his plans to become a sex machine; (Now’s your chance, ladies!);
- Rick Wiles (again) for his insight that the SNL slow jam, “Come Back Barack,” was preparation for the revolution; (Of course, the Rickster has been revolting for quite some time.)
- Alex Jones (again) for figuring out that the Las Vegas shooter was a Libtard. (Based on his choice of soda pop.);
- Mike Hughes for his ongoing attempt to prove the world is flat, and all them thar pointy-headed science types are wrong Wrong! WRONG! (And he’s gonna hop in a rocket to prove it!)
Like I said, it’s been a bit of a slow week, however, a clear loser emerged.
Third place goes to Alex Jones. Early in the week, he decided that the best (or at least, most fun) way of beating the dreaded “Globalists” was to populate the earth with as many Alexandras and Alex Juniors as posible. (It’s a dirty job, but he’s willing to make the sacrifice.)
According to Alex, the “elites” have a plan to exterminate the public, and don’t want us in on their secret. That’s the reason that those rascals don’t have families. (I guess the Big O didn’t get the memo.) And, that’s the reason he’s going to beat them, single membered!
They wouldn’t put kids through what’s about to happen. I’m having more. I’m putting everything I got on the table. I’m going to have more children. We’re going into this. We’re going to win. I’m putting everything on the line. I’m not a coward. I’m having more.
Then later in the week, using scientifical logic, Alex ascertained that the LV shooter was a liberal, because he drank Pepsi.
He drank Pepsi. And again liberals, I mean literally conservatives do not drink — especially in the Obama era — conservatives drink Coca-Cola, if you drink soft drinks, liberals drink Pepsi. That’s a big clue.
(Is it me, or are Jonesie’s conspiracy theories getting lamer lately?)
Which brings us to a man that has always been “Number Two” to me, Rick Wiles.
The Rickster started off the week a bit upset over Saturday Night Live. It seems SNL was guilty of getting its viewers reved up over the coming “revolution.” Those of you who watched the show probably didn’t realize what was going on, but there it was, in musical form. (For those of you who didn’t watch, check the clip below.)
Did you catch it? If not, Ricky provided a tour.
They’re prepping the public for the revolution. We’re going to topple Donald Trump, we’re going to bring back Barack Obama, we’re going to throw out the Constitution and we’re going to start a new country.
OOOKAY! “Throw out the Constitution?” “Start a new country?” Was that in the 3rd or 4th verse? I somehow missed those parts.
It confirms what I said a year ago. Barack Obama will run the country as a president in exile. All of this ‘Resist Trump’ garbage is all being directed by Barack Hussein Obama.
Sorry Ricky, but it doesn’t confirm a damn thing! (Unless it’s the fact that you’re an idiot!)
And, for those of you who wonder whatever happened to the angels that used to beam down to earh, Rick has figured out the answer.
I think, right now, if God sent angels to this country, homosexuals would attempt to rape them. I have read comments by homosexual rights activists—I don’t even want to say the words, I can’t even say it, what they want to do to our Lord, Jesus Christ. I have seen comments, it’s so wicked, so blasphemous I can’t even say it. I don’t want to even go there.
I’m telling you,” he continued, “if angels arrived in some major cities in this country, men would seek to rape them. We have become that wicked.
And, by process of elimination, that brings us to the dumbest thing I’ve heard since Rump last opened his mouth. (Front or rear facing, same difference!)
From California, (Home of more than its share of filberts.) comes word of a dude who’s out to prove those educated eggheads done get it all wrong when they claim the earth is a big blue ball. And, he’s built himself a rocket to prove it.
Mike Hughes wanted to blast off this week, but a federal agency red-lined his request to do it on public land. The “Flat-Head” didn’t get discouraged. He simply moved the launch site to some private land near Amboy. He hopes to rocket off sometime this coming week.
It’s still happening. We’re just moving it three miles down the road. This is what happens anytime you have to deal with any kind of government agency.
Mike’s goal, if he survives this launch, is to go high enough in a future flight to see the whole earth and prove it’s a humongous pancake. (What I don’t think Mike knows, among a hell of a lot of other things, is that would require an altitude of 12,000 miles.)
As Mike explains it,
It’ll shut the door on this ball Earth!
As a “Flat Earther,” Mike doesn’t belive anyone’s made it to space before. After all (according to him) astronauts are just actors with CGI effects.
John Glenn and Neil Armstrong are Freemasons. Once you understand that, you understand the roots of the deception.
Stay tuned! Mike may soon be splattered all over the news. Or, more likely, all over the countryside.
p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it. I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).