Another Weird Week in Cruz(y) Country (VIDEO)

Cruzy the ClownWhen the Regressive presidential wannabes boarded the Bozo Bus (Last cycle’s Clown Car is way too small this time around.) I figured Teddy Boy Cruz would be the biggest filbert in the batch. Little did I realize how stiff the competition was going to be. He’s not only been out-nuttied by Dr. Ben Crazy, but most of all, by The Great American Hairball, the DONALD, himself. But, Teddy Boy is crazy like a fox. Truth be told, he’s probably the smartest Bozo on the bus. (He’s a Hahvuhd alumni and all that.)

While His Hariness sucked up all the media hot air and Dr. Crazy climbed the hill and jumped off the cliff, (His poll numbers are in free fall.) Cruzy was stocking up the Benjamins, (As of the last reporting period, he had the most cash on hand.) me too-ing the DONALD and reaching out to religious troglodytes. His semi-stealth campaign (Well, semi-stealth for him, anyway.) is starting to pay dividends. As Dr. Crazy was burnishing his idiot savant credentials, a lot of his base decided he was too wacko even for them. The prime beneficiary of the outflux turned out to be Cruzy.

If fact, the top political story on Monday would have been a Monmouth University poll that showed Cruzy leading His Hairness in Iowa, 24% to 19%. That is, it would have been if not for the DONALD doing his best impression of Uncle Adolf to date. There are those (myself included) who speculate that Trump went on his Islamophobic rampage to distract attention from the poll. (Btw, it worked beautifully, with the added bonus of boosting Trumps poll numbers up several notches.)

But, that’s just Monday. Let’s check out some of the other goings on in Cruzy Country this past week. (BYO nose plugs.)

Last Saturday, Teddy Boy addressed the “Rising Tide Summit” in Iowa.

We will utterly destroy ISIS. We will carpet bomb them into oblivion. I don’t know if sand can glow in the dark, but we’re going to find out.

Sand glowing in the dark? Well, nukes would probably cause the sand to glow. He can’t be referring to conventional bombs, because we have dropped so many on ISIS already (20,000+) that we’re running out.

Dropping nukes in Syria or Iraq is NOT a good idea. There are somewhere between 30,000 and 100,000 ISIS fighters in the area. A nuclear attack could kill millions, mostly innocent civilians, radicalizing even more of the Arab middle east. Then there’s the refugee problem. Even the credible threat of a nuclear strike would cause so many to flee that the current problem would look like a Sunday picnic by comparison.

Here’s his speech. (Keep the Emetrol handy.)

At a press conference on Tuesday, he claimed that he didn’t agree with the DONALD’s proposal, while at the same time, he applauded his leadership on immigration.  (That’s known as having it both ways.) He also took the opportunity to join with Texas governor, Greg Abbott, in proposing a moratorium on Syrian refugees and allowing Islamophobic governors to opt out of letting refugees settle in their state. (Like most Regressives, Teddy Boy has a very twisted view of the Constitution, especially in the federal supremacy area.)

Also on Tuesday, Cruzy held a climate denying hearing, inviting several anti-climate change witnesses. It was extremely one-sided to say the least. Here’s a few of Teddy Boys’ bovine droppings:

CO2 isn’t bad, because we’ve had more CO2 in our atmosphere then we have right now.

Actually, that statement is true. The last time that happened was millions of years ago. Back then, the world’s seas were up to 100 feet higher than they are today, and the global average surface temperature was up to 11°F warmer than it is now.

Arctic and Antarctic ice are both increasing.

Partially true. While the Antarctic land is shrinking, the Antarctic sea ice is increasing. However, Antarctic sea ice melts every year. As far as Arctic ice, check out the chart.Figure31-300x224

It doesn’t matter than 97 percent of scientists agree about climate change, because 97 percent of scientists said the sun rotated around the earth in the 1600s.

In the 1600’s scientists didn’t use the scientific method. Scientists were philosophers and ideologues, thinking about what made sense to them, rather than conducting experiments.

Satellite data shows no warming for the last 18 years.

13 of the 15 warmest years ever recorded have happened since the year 2000. This year we are about  to set a new record as the hottest year ever recorded.

Is it any wonder that Michael Mann, a Pennsylvania State University meteorology professor wrote,

This individual understands less about science (and climate change) than the average kindergartner. That sort of ignorance would be dangerous in a doorman, let alone a president.
On Wednesday, this avid anti-terrorist skipped two senate hearings on homeland security and ISIS. One featured FBI Director, James Comey, discussing the San Berardino shooting and the other was Senate Armed Services Committee hearing on America’s strategy to combat ISIS. Teddy Boy had other plans for the day. He was up in NYC hustling Wall Street money. (Hey, important things prevail.)

Which brings us to today. (Thursday) Bob Vander Platts, an extremely influential (with troglodytes) Iowa powerbroker/evangelical leader gave Cruzy his endorsement.

The extraordinary leader that we need for these extraordinary times is U.S. Sen. Ted Cruz.

Stay tuned!

Leave a Reply