Libertarian Utopia? Libertarian Scam?

chile_630Throughout history, there have been a number of attempts to build a “Utopia”. I covered some of the sexier 19th century social experiments, such as Nashoba and Oneida in “The Religious Wrong (pt 3: The Great(?) Awakening)” and several of the Mormonite attempts in my “Mormonism: The Big Con?” series. (Shameless plugs #74828 & #74829)

As the population grows, there are fewer and fewer places to get away from the heathen and set up your own magic kingdom on planet Earth. But, leave it to some Libertarians, they’ve found one.

Or, have they?

Too avoid the upcoming world-wide financial collapse and make some bucks, a couple of Libertarian entrepreneurs decided to take a page (actually several) out of Ayn Rand’s book “Atlas Shrugged” and came up with “Galt’s Gulch Chile”. Which is actually kind of funny since the man (Ken Johnson) whose idea it originally was, has never read the book. “Watched the movie and skimmed the Cliff’s Notes, though. Good stuff.”

The other major player in this set piece is one Jeff Berwick, a self-described “Anarcho-Capitalist.  Libertarian.  Freedom fighter against mankind’s two biggest enemies, the State and the Central Banks.” (Jeff makes his money promoting bitcoins, gold and himself.)

Jeff originally hired Ken to market “the many businesses I operate”. Ken turned out to be a great salesman, but the “manager from Hell”. He seemed to have personal relationship issues with anyone that he wasn’t trying to get money out of.

In 2012, Ken flew down to Chile to inspect some land that might make a good Utopia.galts-gulch-lemonsAs you can see from the pic, it’s kind of pretty. A mild Mediterranean climate. 160 acres of lemon trees and another 86 of other crops. Secluded, but just 10 miles off the main highway. An hour out of Santiago in one direction and ocean resorts in another. And the price was right, just $1,500,000 for 11,000 acres of land.galts-gulch-map copyWhen he got back, Galt’s Gulch Chile (GGC) was born. Ken and Jeff formed a 50/50 partnership. Ken, the “marketing manager from Hell”, would take over operations and on-site project manager duties. Jeff, the “business genius” would stay in the U.S. and go out and market the lots. (What could go wrong with a situation like that?)

Ken wanted to sub-divide into 3000 plots, but after they bought, they found out that it could only be zoned for 12 lots. Oh, and that $1.5 million for the land, was just for the land. It didn’t include water rights. It seems that in Chile, land, water rights and mineral rights are separate purchases. They couldn’t buy more water rights, because of Chile’s environmental regulations covering the area.

They decided to sub-divide the non farm land into 430 lots ranging from 1.25 acres to 25 acres. Problem is, due to those same pesky environmental laws, no lots under 10 acres were allowed.

Most of the time, these issues would throw a monkey into the gearbox. But, remember, these are Ayn Rand fanboys. (Even if they haven’t read her books.) Ayn didn’t approve of laws getting in the way of profits and neither did they.

Ken went down to Chile to supervise and Jeff hit the right-wing media circuit. A few months later GGC committed to purchase some adjacent land for $6,000,000. Full payment was due in three months.

Ken hired a sales staff to sell lots on the new land. They had to sell $6,000,000 worth, even though they didn’t own them and the property wasn’t zoned for them.

They didn’t make it! In fact, after a year they had only sold about 50 lots in total.

One of the reasons was that the entire sales crew, except one, quit on the manager from Hell. In the same time period, there was a 99% staff turnover. (Those pesky personal relationship issues again.)

image_2 copyThere was a money-back guarantee that if you bought a lot, got to Chile and didn’t like it. But remember, this is Ayn Rand Land. Money-backs aren’t worth the flash paper they’re written on.

Bills stopped being paid. Staff started missing paychecks. The local laborers also stopped getting paid. (Now, who’s gonna pick those lemons?)

Last month, the (bad) word got out.  The website ceased to exist other than as a photo album. Ken Johnson is who knows where and Jeff is trying to cover his ass. GGC seems to have stopped operations, at least till the lawsuits and possible criminal charges are taken care of.

If this is an example, Libertarian business ethics seem to be the moral equivalent to Ferengi Rules of Acquisition. (Except, I think the Ferengi are a bit more honest.)Little-Green-Men-ferengi-19047412-692-530


New Rule: ‘Greed is Not Good’

As I was doing some early morning research, (Yes Virginia, I research before I rant.) I ran across this Bill Mahar “New Rules” vid. It quickly became my favorite (among many of Bill’s) and I thought I would share it.

Oh, I forgot to mention. The vid is five years old. It came out before “Citizens United”, let alone the “Hobby Lobby” decision. Since then, if anything, the situation has gotten worse. (A lot worse!)

Now that “corporations are people” (not only that, they’re religious) and have a lot more money to spend on “free speech”, we’re descending rather rapidly into a plutocracy.

For instance, the Koch Bros have already financed 44,000 ads (er… excuse me, exercised their ‘free speech rights” 44,000 times) and it’s just a few days past Labor Day. The real heavy spending comes next month.

We have “for profit” schools that generally rank lower than most public schools. And, compared to other countries, our public schools rank way down the list. We’re #27 in math, #22 in science and (here’s the scary one) we’re #33 in reading.

We have “for profit” prisons and we have the second highest percentage of prisoners in the world. (WE’RE #2! WE’RE #2!) The Seychelles beat us out, but China, Russia and Iran (we beat them by a factor of 3) all look up to us in awe.

We have the most expensive health care system in the world. But, in actual results we’re only #37. We should have single coverage health care like almost every other developed country in the world. But then, the insurance companies couldn’t rip you off quite as much!

Late in the vid, Bill brings up another point I had almost forgotten. We used to have usury laws that would get almost all current lenders sent to jail for the interest rates they charge. Inflation took care of that back in the late 70’s. The inflation went away, but the high interest rates are still with us.

I’m not anti-making money. Hell, I’d like a bit more of the filthy lucre myself. However, when greed gets in the way of the general welfare, it’s way past time to re-examine our priorities!

The Clown Car: “On the Road to Iowa”

cpac-clown-car-gopOn March 16th, 1968, Bobby Kennedy announced that he was seeking the Democratic nomination for President. I mention this only as a comment on how much longer these things go on nowadays. It’s only September, 2014, and the roads to New Hampshire and Iowa are already well traveled.

Speaking of Iowa, CNN released a poll (scorecard?) on this cycle’s batch of Bozos.

On the Dem side, Hillary is #1 at 53%. (But she was #1 this time back in ’08 as well.) Joe Biden is 2nd at 15%, which is a lot better than the 1% he ended up with back then. Mz Warren (who doesn’t want the job) is at 7% and Bernie Sanders (who does) logs in at 5%.

I’ll take a closer look at the Dems as this solidifies a bit more. (i.e. When Hillary gets around to telling us that she’s putting on her track shoes.) Right now, this is just Clinton and Biden testing the waters and trying to build a dam to keep the other little fishies out.

Sorry, Sanders fans (of which I am one) but he’s this cycle’s Kucinich or Babbit (if your memory stretches back that far).

The real action is over in the GOP clown car.

Mike Huckabee is the current leader at 21%. (He won the ’08 caucus, for all the good it did him.)

One Paul (Ryan) placed 2nd at 12%. (Speaking of Mr Ryan, I did a profile on him, “Fryin’ Ryan – What You Really Need to Know About Paul Ryan (b.y.o. nausea pills)” last cycle. It’s dated, but still good background info.) Another Paul (Ron) showed 3rd with 7%.

“Bush League’s” bro Jeb, follows at 6% along with future inmate, Chris Christie. Chris’ future cellmates, “Cuzin Ricky” Perry and Scott Walker both come in at 5% as does Macro Rubio. On the tail end (literally and figuratively) are the anti-immigrant Cuban-Canadian, Ted Cruz, Bobby (What? Me Worry?) Jindal and St. Orum.

This cycle’s St. Orum is Huckabee. That’s only fair, because St. Orum was last cycle’s Huckabee. Speaking of Mike. He looks a lot like the old Jim Neighbors character “Gomer Pyle”. So, from now on he’s Mike “Gomer” Huckabee.101123_mike_huckabee_ap_328If Repugnut tradition repeats, #2 (in more ways than one) Paul Ryan will end up the eventual nominee, but there’s a lot of things that could change that. Plus, he couldn’t even carry his home state last time. If you can’t carry your home state, you can”t carry the country. Just ask Willie. (He lost all three “home states”.)

Normally, I’d say Jeb would take it, but there’s this lingering “Bush aftertaste” that will eliminate him. That’s sad in a way, as he was always the smarter brother, but after 8 years of George “duh”, it ain’t gonna happen.

Sometime this year, or early next, Christie is going to find himself sidetracked with a nasty trial as will the Rickster (Cuzin Ricky) and, unless he can appoint some more “impartial” judges, Scott Walker.

Marco seems to keep slipping on the immigration issue, however he’ll probably be the Veep pick. He’ll be chosen to drum up some Hispanic voters. Problem is that it won’t work. Hispanics are not a monolithic group. Cubans are not the same as Mexicans or Central Americans. Who or what one group wants is not always the same as the others.

At the bottom of the pile is a trio that will probably win some primaries in the south, but otherwise…….

Teddy (bear) Cruz is my personal favorite. Not because he could win. He can’t!!! But, he would make this one of the more interesting (as in weird) campaigns in recent memory. This latter-day Joe McCarthy is a snarkist’s dream.

Jindal’s a joke. One that’s not shared very much outside of Louisiana. He does have the Alfred E. Neuman look going for him, but that’s about all.separated_at_birth1238014814Very appropriately, at the bottom of the excrement pile, sits the “guy from God” himself, St. Orum. He had a hell of a run last time around, but Gomer’s back.

So ends my prognostications.

Are my picks 100% accurate? Hell no, but they’re probably as accurate as those of the leading Washington pundits. (Mainly because they’re not all that accurate, themselves.)

Stay tuned! The fun is just beginning.

Reverend Robertson’s Top 17 Greatest Misses

cbn_700club_warming_jupiter_140107g-615x345A couple of days ago, I wrote a post on one of crazy uncle Pat Robertson’s pontifications. That particular pontification was on the urgent need to have armed guards in church. It seems there’s a war on “Christians” (More on that coming up.) and churches are dangerous places to be unarmed.

It is true, that if you go to church religiously every week for 11 years, you have a 1 in 25,000 chance of sitting in your pew when a shooting occurs. That’s 1 in 14,300,000 every time you enter the chapel. (I get cold sweats every time I think about it. But then I remember that I’m not a subscriber to any of the current prevailing mythologies, and I haven’t been inside a church in decades.)

Anyway, it got me started thinking about all the other dumb things Pat has pondered over time. I needed a good chuckle so I decided to put together a list of his “All-timers”. But then I discovered there were soooo many!

I pruned and pared on my Apple until I ended up with the following juicy fruits. (Oooh, sorry ’bout that one.) Like all lists of this sort, it is entirely subjective. If you have a fave that didn’t make the list, feel free to quote it in the comment section. It should make for some fun reads.

And now, ladies and gentlemen, without further ado (as opposed to adieu) may I present, straight from the horse’s mouth (the nether one) :


(70% more insanity than your average “Top Ten” list.)

#17    Planned Parenthood’s Real Job

“Planned Parenthood is teaching kids to fornicate, teaching people to have adultery, every kind of bestiality, homosexuality, lesbianism – everything that the Bible condemns.” The 700 Club, (4/9/1991)

#16    Importing Hinduism

Vishnu, Hare Krishna. The origin of it is all demonic. We can’t let that stuff come into America.

#15    Episcopalians, Methodists & Presbyterians Are The Spirit of the Anti-Christ

“You say you’re supposed to be nice to the Episcopalians and the Presbyterians and the Methodists and this, that, and the other thing. Nonsense, I don’t have to be nice to the spirit of the Antichrist.” The 700 Club, (1/14/1991)9111#14     God As Holy Hit Man

“Lord, give us righteous judges who will not try to legislate and dominate this society. Take control, Lord! We ask for additional vacancies on the court.

#13     Blasted Are the Peacemakers

“Maybe we need a very small nuke thrown off on Foggy Bottom to shake things up”

#12    The Bible Belt Doesn’t Pray Enough

“If enough people were praying, (God) would’ve intervened. You could pray. Jesus stilled the storm. You can still storms.”

 #11    Haiti’s Deal With the Devil

Haitians were originally under the heel of the French. You know, Napoleon the third, or whatever. And they got together and swore a pact to the devil. They said, we will serve you if you will get us free from the French. True story. And so, the devil said, okay it’s a deal.”

#10    Gay Day at Disney World? God’ll Get You For That!

“…a condition like this will bring about the destruction of your nation. It’ll bring about terrorist bombs; it’ll bring earthquakes, tornadoes, and possibly a meteor.”

#9      Gays, the Gateway to Pedophilia & Beastiality

…if we take biblical standards away in homosexuality, what about the other? And what about bestiality and ultimately what about child molestation and pedophilia?”

#8     Gays Will Infect You With Their Poison Rings

So if they got the stuff they’ll have a ring, you shake hands and the ring’s got a little thing where you cut your finger. Really. It’s that kind of vicious stuff, which would be the equivalent of murder.”

#7     Lefties Kill Babies to Make Lesbians Equal

If they abort their babies, then that kind of puts them on a level playing field.”

#6      Husbands Cheat, But It’s the Wife’s Fault.






“Here’s the secret. Stop talking the cheating. He cheated on you, well, he’s a man.”

#5      Divorce is a “No-No”, Unless Your Wife is Very Sick

“I know it sounds cruel, but if he’s going to do something, he should divorce her and start all over again, but to make sure she has custodial care and somebody (is) looking after her.”

#4      Big Daddy Told Him Willie Would Win

“He’s going to have a second term. He’s going to win. Romney will win the election. Cause the Lord told me.”

#3      Pat Predicts That Terrorist Attacks Will Kill Millions In 2007

“There’s a possibility that — not a possibility, a definite certainty that chaos is going to rule,”

#2      Liberals Want to Destroy Christians.

“Just like what Nazi Germany did to the Jews, so liberal America is now doing to the evangelical Christians. It’s no different. It is the same thing. It is happening all over again. It is the Democratic Congress, the liberal-based media and the homosexuals who want to destroy the Christians.” 1993  Interview with Molly Ivins

#1(a)   Pat’s Pro Pot

“I really believe we should treat marijuana the way we treat beverage alcohol,”pat-robertson-pot-billboard

#1(b) Pat’s Anti Pot

“Do you want your little 8th grader to be stoned when he goes to school? Well, welcome to Colorado, where pot is legal.”

(Earth to Pat: Teen usage of pot in Colorado has declined since legalization.)

And to think this is a former presidential candidate. He even placed 2nd in the 1988 Iowa Republican primary. (Which says a lot about Iowa repugnuts.)

Hope you enjoyed the list. You can add any missed favorites in the comments.

Pat Robertson: Arm the Chruches!

Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.” Mathew 5:9

pat-robertsonBlessed are the fully armed for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven.” Pat Robertson

I’ve always had a soft spot in my head for Pat Robertson. He’s the crazy uncle I’m glad I never had. Plus to a professional snarkist like me, he’s a never-ending fountain of “WTF’s”.

I’m not sure his latest pontification, would make the top ten of his “Greatest Misses”, (I’ll have to check that out.) but as a person that used to think that Christianity was all about peace and love, (Give me a break, I was only seven.) it caught my eye.

It seems that Uncle Pat is concerned with the rash of church shootings. I did some checking and the only comprehensive listing I could find was on the Defensive Carry website. It listed 18 shootings in 11 years, and not all of those were during services.

Since there are around 450,000 churches in the U.S., that means that your chance of pew sitting at one of these events over the entire 11 year span was .004% (1 in 25,000). That makes them considerably safer than your average convenience store, or almost any other business you’d care to mention.

But good ol’ Uncle Pat was never one to let an inconvenient reality get in the way, so Tuesday on the 700 Club, he had a few things to say.

“What is the new Beatitude? Blessed are the fully armed for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven. I really believe that if the bad guys understand that the citizenry are able to react against them then they won’t be as free to go into a crowded mall or a school or a church and start blowing people out.”

“I do believe that that if people are trained with firearms, and they’re able to protect themselves, I don’t think it will lead to more violence, it will lead to less. The idea of having citizens who are trained or to have off-duty police in your church is not a bad thing.”

 “Jesus wept.” John 11:35

My Woman, My Wife, My Penis Home(?)

Oh, come on. It's not that big!

Oh, come on. It’s not that big!

Some of you may recall a post I did about three weeks ago on Marvelous Mark Driscoll, the Mars Hill Mega-church Mega-minister mired in mega-problems. In it, I briefly discussed Marvelous Marks maliciously medieval take on gender equality.

Well, Marvelous Mark put his foot (or some other body extremity) in it again.

“The first thing to know about your penis is, that despite the way it may see, it is not your penis. Ultimately, God created you and it is his penis. You are simply borrowing it for a while.”

(We’re just borrowing our bald headed yogurt slinger from Big Daddy? Hmmm. Makes you wonder how many he has in his collection. And how ’bout Tom & Harry, its ballsy companions? Who do those belong to? Inquiring minds want to know!)

“While His penis is on loan you must admit that it is sort of just hanging out there very lonely as if it needed a home, sort of like a man wondering the streets looking for a house to live in. Knowing that His penis would need a home, God created a woman to be your wife and when you marry her and look down you will notice that your wife is shaped differently than you and makes a very nice home.”

(Despite my rather perverse nature, I’ll refrain from any “don’t want to leave home” jokes.)

Because of this and a few minor other factors (abuse of power, plagiarism, misappropriation of church funds, etc), on August 25th, Marvy Mark took a six week sabbatical. (aka “Laying low til the heat hopefully wears off.”)

You can hear him whining about it on this clip:

All the controversy over the last few months have taken a toll on the church. They are closing several branches and circling the wagons. For instance, Pastor Mark Dunford of the Portland branch has been dismissed because he joined eight other pastors in calling for Marvy’s resignation.

This story is far from over for the Hip-hop Calvinist bible thumper. He’ll be back in the saddle next month and I don’t think his problems are going away. This has the potential of getting nastier (and juicier).

Stay tuned sports fans!


Readin, Ritein, Rithmatic (& Rifles?)

COMING TO A SCHOOL NEAR YOU?militarized_police-600x250

Particularly since Ferguson, there has been a lot written about militarizing the police over the last few years. Turns out, that may be just the tip of the iceberg.

There’s also been a lot written about arming school personnel to deal with school shootings, despite the abysmal track record of same. In fact, I even wrote about it yesterday (9/6/14).

It was probably inevitable that the two would join. It was also probably inevitable that Texas would be in the forefront of the conjunction.

Ten Texas school districts have taken possession of

  • 64 M16 rifles;M16 Viper with the Coyote Ugly Finish, by M16 Clinic
  • 18 M14 rifles;mk14mod0
  • 25 automatic pistols;swmp1522
  • magazines capable of holding 4,500 rounds of ammunition;1372514406_4-Magazine-for-n30-shot-5
  • armor plating;756px-Add-on_kit
  • tactical vests;army_iba
  • 15 military

Now, before you start worrying about little Johny or Jane getting his or her hands on this equipment and taking out their least favorite teachers, never fear. The guns, ammo and equipment will be stored off-site at the various school district armories. (Texas school districts have armories???)

Soooo, lets run a little scenario to see if we’re really walking towards Cleveland with this one or it’s another Weird Al parody.

The San Antonio Independent School District is one of the beneficiaries of Pentagon largess, so , for this exercise, they get to be “ground zero”. (Btw, the SA ISD is rated “academically unacceptable” by the Texas Education Agency, but damn it, they do have their own armory and a bunch of fun toys.)

First of all, there are 91 schools and academies in the district, so hopefully the crisis is at a school close by. Even then, you would have to pull security personnel off the other unaffected schools or wherever they happen to be, get them to the armory, get them armed and organized and get them to the affected school (if anyone’s still alive to rescue).

Then, of course, they would have to coordinate their activities with the police who have probably already been on the scene for 30 minutes to an hour, and who may, or may not wish to share. (Territorial imperative and all that.)

But, lets say the pros and the rent-a-cops have a good working relationship. They join forces to take on the bad guy(s) and/or gal(s). It’s a SLAM DUNK WIN right?????

Well, Virginia Tech had an on-site “SWAT” team. That didn’t stop 32 people from getting killed and another 17 from being wounded.

Of course, situations like this require a police response, but I would rather trust the “pros” than a bunch of gear-happy gun-slingers who weren’t quite good enough to be real policemen.

Finally one has to ask, if having these “hammers”, district officials view something like a student protest as a “nail”?

I’ve been in a couple of those in my lifetime, ranging from a middle school protest over taking out our jukebox in the lunch room to a Berkeley demonstration over working conditions of school employees. Neither was remotely violent, but then the other side didn’t have all those neat toys to play with. And, before you say that would never happen, talk to some Ferguson residents.Militarized-Police-108491097767Fortunately, the Dept of Justice and Congress are reviewing the military surplus program, following more than a few abuses.

Did Obama & the Illuminati Kill Joan Rivers?

Here’s the latest from the right wing-nut “Conspiracies-R-Us” department. According to them, that African Islamist, Barack Hussein Obama conspired with the very Christian Illuminati to rub out Joan Rivers. The C-R-U gang doesn’t mention which Illuminati it is, (There’s more than one offshoot of the original Bavarian Illuminati.) but whoever it is, they’ve got this “super-secret” hit list and Joan’s name is (was?) on it.

It seems that Joan “outed” the president. Not only that, but she exposed Mrs Obama as a tranny. She never explained how she found out. Possibly used her “gaydar” on Barack and her “trannydar” on Michelle. I really don’t know. (Or care.)

Since she disclosed a deeply held state secret, it’s obvious that she had to go. At least it’s obvious to the nut jobs. I’m not quite sure how the Illuminati got involved with a Kenyan Muslim in all this, but according to some, they are the “black bag” specialists.

A couple of months after Joan laid it all out, she went to the doctor for a “routine procedure”. She suffered a cardiac arrest and was sent to Mount Sinai Hospital where she died a week later.

An autopsy was performed, but the “cause and manner of death” will require more studies. (Damn, the Illuminati are good!)

I’ve tried to track the source of the above video. It’s featured in a lot of loosenut sites, but the farthest back I could trace was to a YouTube account dedicated to the coverup of “Planet X”.

Or maybe Beyoncé had something to do with it? There’s another theory circulating in the TWIT’r sphere, as reported in the “International Business Times“. It goes something like this:

Joan’s last tweet was a Beyoncé dig:

“A man reportedly got his finger bitten off at a Beyoncé concert! The shocking twist: it wasn’t Jay Z’s finger and it wasn’t by Solage.

Of course, after a slam like that, Ms Rivers had to pay. Sure enough, less than a day later, she went into cardiac arrest. (I’ve had my cardiac arrested. It’s not a lot of giggles.)

Not only that, but Joan was born in ’33 and died at the age of 81 on Beyoncé’s birthday. Beyoncé is 33 and born in ’81. There you go! Proof positive to anyone with an I.Q. over 16 (and under 35) . Beyoncé’s bloody hand prints are all over this!

Between you and me, this sucks. The woman was troubled and not everybody’s “cuppa tea”, (and definitely not mine) but she and her family deserve better than this.



Arm The Teachers! What Could Possibly Go Wrong?


“The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.”

Well, that’s the N.R.A. (stage name for the National Rifle & Ammunition Manufacturer’s Lobby) mantra anyway. Trouble is, it’s just another bovine bowel movement emanating from the mouth of Wayne LaPierre.

As I wrote in my “The Myth, Mythos & Myths of the NRA (pt 3: Collateral Damage)” post for “Grumbles From an Old Grouch“, It’s been proven time and again that it doesn’t work that way.

  • There was a police officer stationed at Columbine High School. He exchanged fire twice, but couldn’t stop the killings.
  • There was an armed emergency response team (think SWAT team) on duty during the Virginia Tech massacre. Didn’t stop 32 people killed and 17 wounded.
  • There were armed and trained personnel at the time of both Fort Hood shootings in 2009 & 2014.
  • The four police personnel killed in the Coffee Shop Police killings were certainly armed.

I could only find two occasions, out of more than 60 tragedies, where someone armed has stopped what could have been a mass shooting: In 1991 at an Alabama Shoney’s and a 2007 shooting at the New Life Church in Colorado Springs. I’ve read other claims, but when you check closely, it’s usually after the shooting when the killer was trying to get away and in one case cited (Appalachian School of Law shooting) in which the gunman was taken down by an unarmed ex Marine before two armed students could actually intervene.

But, never get little things like facts get in the way of promoting a gun culture.

There are already armed police at a large number of U.S. schools, but according to Mr. LePew, oops, LaPierre (nah, I was right the first time) there’s never enough “armed good guys” involved. Problem is, police types cost money! Quite a bit of money! Gotta keep the budget down. What to do? What to do?

EUREKA! WE’LL ARM THE TEACHERS!! We’ll give them a bit of training, they can use their own gun, and we won’t even have to pay them any more than we already do. Problem solved!

The usual suspects jumped at the chance to put their stamp of approval on the idea. Luminaries such as Texas Rep. Louie (Goober) Gohmert, ex-Virginia gov Bob (Governor Gifty) McDonnell and Texas gubner, Rick (Cuzin’ Ricky) Perry.

A number of states adopted the idea. I mean, what could go wrong?Arming-Teachers_zpsb8888822

The Idaho legislature voted this summer to allow teachers to carry on school grounds an campuses. Just a week in the school year, it turns out there just might be some downsides to this. An Idaho State University professor was carrying his gun in his pocket when it went off and shot him in the foot. Maybe he forgot to put the safety on, of maybe he was just trying to get out of class that day. I really don’t know. What I do know is that I wouldn’t want to be in his class. The next time the barrel may not be pointed straight down.

Of course, this isn’t the only or the first “gun accident” at school:

Will arming teachers curb the school shootings? Time will tell, but the odds and history are against it.resized_creepy-willy-wonka-meme-generator-oh-you-think-we-should-give-every-teacher-a-gun-i-bet-that-ll-prevent-people-from-getting-shot-23c25cWill these accidental incidents increase as more and more amateurs carry on campus? Time will tell, but the odds and history are for it.

Whatever Happened to “Separation of Church & State”?


From: Dept. of Unintended Consequences Knowledge (D.U.C.K.)

To: Joseph and Mary Corporation

Re: Burwell v. Hobby Lobby Stores Inc.

Mr. & Ms. Corporation, after exhaustive research, D.U.C.K. has come to the conclusion that the five Republican Catholic males on the (not-so) Supreme Court screwed it BIG TIME in Burwell v. Hobby Lobby Stores Inc!

We believe that their version of “religion” led them to the conclusion that an employer’s professed beliefs trumps a worker’s civil rights and any laws or rulings associated with them. This will result in consequences they totally ignored.

Despite Sam Alito’s insistence that the ruling was on very narrow grounds, the history of decisions like this point to the opposite. This is going to be expanded on in a number of directions.

Allowing a business to deny contraception coverage due to religious objections is just the start. A business run by Christian Scientists can rightfully claim that, due to their beliefs, they shouldn’t have to pay for health insurance. There are some businesses run by evangelicals that don’t believe women should work at all. Therefore, the hell with any rules, they’ll argue they don’t have to hire women. Also, forget civil rights laws when it comes to LBGT. Businesses will claim that because of their religious beliefs, they don’t have to hire them or do business with them.

Islamic run companies are going to claim exemptions due to Sharia law. There are around 2 ½ million Muslims in the U.S., so that’s going to affect a lot of companies.

Some states are trying to pass legislation that prohibits judges from considering Sharia law. After Hobby Lobby, those state laws are worthless. (They’re worthless already, but that’s a different subject.)

In a slight twist, we are investigating one rumor that job applications have soared at Rastafarian run businesses.

image.adapt.960.highThe Satanic Temple is already using H.L. to exempt its members from being subjected to “informed consent” abortion laws. The Temple claims “state-mandated information with no basis in scientific fact violates its religious beliefs. They’ve already created a website where a woman can print out a letter to her doctor explaining why she is exempt, even if she isn’t a member of the Temple.

The Satanists aren’t the only group that will use Hobby Lobby in their fight against abortion restrictions. American Baptists, Methodists, Conservative & Reform Jews are arguing that their religious views are in conflict with abortion restrictions.

Religious aspects aside, D.U.C.K. has found that the major unintended consequence of the ruling is that it rips apart “the corporate veil”.

In the 2001 case, Cedric Kushner Promotions v. Don King, the court said

“linguistically speaking, the employee and the corporation are different “persons,” even where the employee is the corporation’s sole owner. After all, incorporation’s basic purpose is to create a distinct legal entity, with legal rights, obligations, powers, and privileges different from those of the natural individuals who created it, who own it, or whom it employs.”

That is the corporate veil and the reason that when the big banks purposely screw up some home buyers or even the whole economy, they may get hit with a fine, but the real engineers of the dirty deeds never spend any time at the “Iron Bar Hotel”.

The problem that Hobby Lobby creates is that if a corporation has the religious rights of its owners, it blurs the distinction between the two entities and therefore makes the owners liable for the actions of the corporation.

It’s a well marked 2-way street. In fact, 44 law professors filed a “friends-of-the-court” brief calling the court’s attention to that fact. The Catholic male judges ignored the brief.

D.U.C.K. has come to the conclusion that, because of the “corporate veil” aspect, the Hobby Lobby decision may turn out to be one of the biggest corporate headaches in the foreseeable future.

However, Hobby Lobby isn’t the real problem. It’s just a symptom. The real problem is the law that the Hobby Lobby case was built on: the Religious Freedom Restoration Act. But that’s the subject for another memo.