Wingnut: Junior’s Russian Meeting A Dark State Plot To Impeach Trump

End times “Khristian” (‘Cause, he sure as hell ain’t “Christian!”) troglodyte, Rick Wiles, has this whole dang thing about Junior Trump’s “Russian Adoption” meeting all figured out.

Don’t believe your lyin’ eyes when you read the emails. Don’t believe your lyin’ ears when you hear Junior’s various changing stories about the shits-ka-bob!

Believe the man who said Big Daddy would throw a fireball at us because “marriage equality.” Believe the man who said Target Restroom Policy Will Spark Nuclear War. Believe the man who said Obama Killed Scalia As A Pagan Human Sacrifice (And, he had the numerology to prove it.)

Believe that man!

Now that I’ve established the Rickster’s bona fides, on to his latest oral bowel movement in his very own words. (Or, maybe his script writer’s.)

 

I smell a skunk in the garden. It was a set-up. The dark state feared Donald Trump would defeat the queen of sleaze, Hillary Clinton; they saw the massive, enthusiastic crowds standing in line for hours to see their hero, Donald Trump. They also saw the empty seats at Hillary Clinton rallies. The deep state feared they couldn’t steal enough votes on election day to rig the election in Hillary’s favor and what did they do? They immediately began working on Plan B: Sabotage the Trump presidency if he won in November.

The deep state concocted this fake narrative over a year ago and started planting fake evidence to be used later to bolster the claim. The meeting between the Russian lawyer and Donald Trump Jr. was part of the scheme to plant evidence—fake evidence—in 2016 that could be used in 2017 to impeach Donald Trump as a Russian stooge!

You have got to give the dark state credit for being creative. They are masterful liars.

WOW! Just WOW! Think about that!

The “Deep State,” (Definitions of which, change, depending on the circumstances.) got several people with connections to Putin or Russian intelligence agencies (Some rather strong.) to cooperate with our intelligence agencies (The definition of “Deep State,” in this circumstance.)

Soooo, what’s Putin’s part in this? Something along this scale of scam, perpetrated by people at that level? And he didn’t know about it, let alone approve it? Believe that, and I’ve got this bridge in NYC, you might be interested in purchasing.

And the “Deep State” could tell he was going to win because of his YUGE crowds? (Bernie had bigger and he lost.) And, they couldn’t rig enough Hillary votes? Trump, hisownself, claims they did, and he wouldn’t lie would he?

(There will be a slight pause while you finish laughing your ass off.)

But surely, the Rickster had proof of all of this! I mean, he wouldn’t just pull it out of his tinfoil toupee, would he?

COULD BE!

Grouchy
p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

 

 

Alex Jones: Trump Jr. Caught in a Russian Hoax Witch Hunt

I hate to break it to you, but Alex Jones just “proved” that this whole Trump Jr/email situation is just a bunch of Libtard “fake news.” So, don’t believe your lying eyes if you read the emails. It’s just Junior setting a trap.

I was just watching during the break Democrat senators flipping out on CNN going, “This is incredibly serious, Donald Jr., Russians did influence the election.” Because they met with one lady who wanted to talk about sanctions. They’re like, “No, we want to talk about Russian connections to Hillary” — which are now confirmed. That’s Donald Jr. doing his job. So that he’s trying to find Russian spies.

You see in his other life, the Butthead clone is a super-secret-agent-counter-spy. (I wonder if Junior works for the same super-secret agency as Perry the Platypus? That would explain so much!) He’s so super-secret that the only one who knows about this is our boy Alex. (Until now!)

Not only that, but Junior was “set up by the deep state working through this bygone producer from Britain!(See, he was so super-secret that the other super-secret-spies didn’t even know he was one of them.)

But, that’s all right! According to Alex, besides attempting to glean super-secret information on Russian nefarious deeds, it was all “a Russian hoax witch hunt!”

They tricked him into the meeting, he knew it was bull and he got out!

So, you see folks, you should just move along. There’s absolutely nothing in this “nothing-burger” worth smelling. Just a secret-spy, tricked by other secret-spies into spying on a spy who gave him nothing to spy on, so he went home.

END OF STORY!

….Except….why didn’t he continually lie about this for months? Why didn’t he pass along any info gained to the proper people who handle this sort of thing? In 2000, when the Gore campaign was given the Bush campaign’s debate information, they passed it along to the FBI. Seems like the proper thing to do.

….Oh! That’s right! Junior is a secret-spy (Or was, until Alex “outed” him.) for another secret-spy-organization! ‘Nuff said!

If you haven’t run out of Emetrol after that last vid, here’s another.

Grouchy
p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

 

 

Wingnut: Stop Funding Planned Parenthood And God Will Heal All Disease (Video)

Gordon Klingenschmitt is one of those “Khristian” (As opposed to “Christian,” which he ain’t!) troglodytes that gets the eminations of his oral and anal cavities mixed up!

I won’t go deep into his history, (If you want to, start here!) other than to mention that he was a chaplin in the navy, built a “ministry” around a lie about his court martial that got him kicked out, and then found enough stupid people in Colorado to elect him to office. Although, even they weren’t stupid enough to elect him again. (He lost in the primary.)

Since then he’s back with his ministry and a regular on the “Pepe the Frog” circuit. Oh, and he has a program, ironically named “Pray in Jesus Name,” even though, where J.C. preached love, he preaches hate!

On his program last week, he weighed in on the Senate battle over its “DeathCare” bill. According to Gordo-head, we don’t need no stinking bill. All we have to do is make the government quit funding Planned Parenthood abortions and the “Guy in the sky” will “heal your diseases.”

He claims the politicians fighting to keep Planned Parenhood abortion funding “are being influenced by a demonic spirit because they want to kill children with your taxpayer dollars” Of course, almost every group that Gordo-head doesn’t like is, according to him, influenced by demonic spirits.

For instance:

  • The Disney Corp for making “Beauty & the Beast(The movie was made to turn kids gay.);
  • ABC TV for creating a show with a gay minister (Heaven forbid, or at least, Gordo-head forbid.);
  • Gays (Of course!);
  • The Supreme Court (I did a post on that a couple of years ago.);
  • And ex-President Obama! (You knew that one was coming!)

There’s a whole bunch more, but you get the idea.

Back to his latest oral bowel movement:

You know what the solution to America’s healthcare crisis is? Obey the Ten Commandments, stop funding abortion, stop funding child killing and God will heal your diseases, America. The supernatural blessing of healing is available if we stop working with the demonic spirit of murder…we would receive [Big Daddy’s] healing and wouldn’t need to rely on socialist healthcare.

A couple of inconvenient “truth bombs” that either G-h is to ignorant to be aware of, or just get in the way of his rants:

  1. THERE IS NO FEDERAL FUNDING FOR ABORTIONS! Whether it’s to Planned Parenthood or Joe’s All Night Garage and Fetus Killing Palace!
  2. There are a number of countries where abortions are illegal and I haven’t noticed Big D jumping in and curing all their diseases.

But, then again, what is truth to a bozo that makes his bucks selling hate and lies?

Stay tuned!

Grouchy
p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

Did Ann Coulter Help Write Trump’s Anti-Muslim Immigration Policy?

Ann Coulter (aka “The Wicked Witch of the NE”) is back in the news cycle again.

Today’s [7/10/17] issue of “New York Magazine” has some excerpts from Joshua Green’s new book, “Devil’s Bargain.” While the book is mostly about Steve Bannon’s influence over Donald Trump, there is a very interesting part about Ms Coulter.

When Trump came under fire because his campaign hadn’t produced a single policy paper, Bannon arranged for [Sam] Nunberg and Ann Coulter, the conservative pundit, to quickly write a white paper on Trump’s immigration policies. When the campaign released it, Coulter, without disclosing her role, tweeted that it was “the greatest political document since the Magna Carta.”

This isn’t the first time Trump has depended on Coulter’s racist views to rev up his rhetoric.

As Peter Reinart put it in “The Atlantic” back in June, 2016:

The secret of Trump’s success, she argues, has been ideological. He recognized that “Americans,” by which she mostly means Republicans, “are homesick.” They don’t just oppose immigration because they believe it depresses wages and strains government services. They’re homesick for a whiter America, an America that was once truly free because “it’s not in the Anglo-Saxon character either to take orders or to give them.” (Never mind about slavery.) Since 1965, however, when Lyndon Johnson signed legislation allowing more immigration from Latin America, Asia, and Africa, the United States has been, according to Coulter in In Trump We Trust, overrun by “illiterate peasants … who can be instructed to learn certain symbols and bloc-vote for the Democrats.” In response, Democrats, along with rich Republicans, keep the doors open to non-European immigration, and thus America has grown “browner” and “shorter.” (That’s Coulter’s description from Adios America). Corruption rises. So does terrorism and rape.

The only thing that surprises me out of all of this is that Trump didn’t put her in charge of Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS).

Stay Tuned!

Grouchy

Featured Image Credit: Gage Skidmore

p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

Wingnut Preacher: Trump ‘Receives Downloads’ From God

Everybody’s (not-so) favorite ex-con/current con artist, Jim Bakker, loves to have fellow filberts on his Survivalist Infomercial (aka “The Jim Bakker Show“). This week, one of the guests was a Khristian (as opposed to “Christian”) bible-beater named Frank Amedia.

For those of you fortunate enough not to have run across Mr. Ameia, he’s a self-anointed “apostle” who claims to have single-handedly stopped waves from the 2011 tsunami in Japan from hitting a Hawaiian island. (King Canute is spinning in his grave.)

I stood at the edge of my bed and I said, ‘In the name of Jesus, I declare that tsunami to stop now.’ And I specifically said, ‘I declare those waters to recede.’

He’s also a self-proclaimed profit….er, “prophet.” and joined other profits (Damn! Did it again.) prophets, to create a “POTUS Shield.” After all, Trump was (according to these nut jobs)God’s Guy,” annointed by Big Daddy hisownself. (I wonder what grade of crude oil, B.D. used?)

Well, I gotta tell ya, this bit of butt bussing impressed Trump (aka Herr Rump) sooo much that he made Frank and some of the gang, Official Trump “Christian policy liaisons.”

Anyway, as I said earlier, Frank and fellow flibert, Jim, got to gether this week so that Frank could regale us with his tales of Trump prophecies that slipped through his tinfoil toupee.

Among the tales was one of Big D. oiling (Did he use Exon oil?) up Herr Rump with a “Breaker Anointment,” so that Rump could break up things. You know, like the Republican and Democratic parties, as well as the news media. (Other than the Bullshit Mtn variety, of course.)

So, watch out, Kim Jong-un, YHWH’s “Breaker-in-Chief” is on the loose and looking at you!

So, you know, North Korea, you’d better be on your toes because you’re up against a breaker anointing of God. This isn’t about politics, this isn’t government as usual, this isn’t even militaristic, God has raised up…a breaker anointing. Anything that God opposes him against, he breaks up. He broke up the Republican Party…he broke up the Democratic Party, he broke up the news media. Everything that comes against him, he has a hammer against. So, I’m telling you, North Korea, you’d better stand down because you’re up against the breaker anointing of God.

Frank also had a few things to say about Herr Rumps fave-o-rite night-time activity: tweeting. According to Frank the twit’s tweets are part of the “gift of wisdom” that Elohim (Another of the Big Guy’s many aliases.) gave the Trumpster. Besides, because of Herr Rump’s “God-given gift of discernment,” being Prexy is a boring job and our pear-less leader needs distraction.

I believe he receives downloads that now he’s beginning to understand come from God.

(I have to wonder if Frank isn’t getting the “guy in the sky” and Putin confused.)

Stay tuned! (Or not.)

Grouchy

h/t: Right Wing News

Featured Image Credit: YouTube screen grab
p.s.: If my ramblings don’t revolt you, check out my FaceBook page (“Grouchy’s Grumbles”) you might just enjoy it. Better yet, you might “like” it.  I’d love it if you did. It’s free (and worth every cent) and almost completely painless (other than the usual bad jokes).

Rick Santorum: ‘Millions of Americans’ With Preexisting Conditions Are Stealing Health Care

Santorum by Gage SkidmoreAccording to the Kaiser Family Foundation, 52 million Americans have preexisting conditionsthat would likely leave them uninsurable if they applied for individual market coverage under pre-ACA underwriting practices.” That’s 27% of the adult population under 65 years old.

According to Rick Santorum, millions of those people are thieving scammers!

As part of a panel discussion about health care reform on today’s (2/26/17)  CNN’s “State of the Union” program, Santorum stated,

The reality is today that thousands, maybe approaching millions of Americans, are paying nine months for insurance. Why? Because you pay for your insurance for nine months, there’s a provision in Obamacare that says you can’t be thrown off your plan for three months. So, you stop paying in September until the end of the year. You have a right to guaranteed [coverage for] preexisting conditions. You can buy a new plan in January. So people are paying nine months for 12 months of care. And it’s happening more and more and more as people get the gig.

Of course, Santorum offered up absolutely no evidence to back up this preposterous claim!

He then went on to claim that because of all this scamming, it would be impossible to repeal and replace the ACA at the same time.

Obamacare is a failure! But you’re going to need 60 votes to change preexisting conditions and other things to make the system work. And that’s the problem of repeal and replacing is you can’t do it because it’s a broken system.

Featured Image: Gage Skidmore

Gohmert: No Town Hall Because Some Loony Lefty Might “2nd Amendment Solution” Him

Louie GohmertMy favo-right Texass Tea Potty filbert is back in the news. The one, the only, (thank goodness) “Screwy” Louie Gohmert! (I have a huge weakness for silly and in that category, “Screwy” Louie leads the league!)

As you may have noticed, this has NOT been a good week for Republican regressives, town hall wise. Those that have held them, faced angry crowds obsessed with the probable upcoming loss of their health insurance.

One explanation for this is that a lot of their constituents found out that the “Obamacare” that they hated was actually the “Affordable Care Act,” that they loved.

Another explanation, one much favored by these self-same regressive Republicans, is that it was all organized and paid for by elite lefties like George Soros and his ilk. (If so, why wasn’t I informed of this cushy gig?)

Other “representatives of the people” took the Yellow Road to Chickenville and refused to hold town halls or even meet with their constituents. Care to guess which group, Screwy Louie  joined?

Tuesday, (2/21/17) a group in Screwy’s district, called “Indivisible of Smith County” called for a town hall meeting. Sadly, their man(?) in congress declined. However, you do have to give him half a point for coming up with the sorriest excuse so far.

Unfortunately, at this time there are groups from the more violent strains of the leftist ideology, some even being paid, who are preying on public town halls to wreak havoc and threaten public safety. Threats are nothing new to me and I have gotten my share as a felony judge. However, the House Sergeant at Arms advised us after former Congresswoman Gabby Giffords was shot at a public appearance, that civilian attendees at Congressional public events stand the most chance of being harmed or killed—just as happened there.

Point of clarification: Jared Lee Loughner, the Gabby Giffords shooter, was NOT an adherent of “leftist ideology!” He was a right-wing filbert with severe mental problems. (Btw, Screwy Louie just voted to give the mentally questionable greater access to firearms.)

As a back-up reason for avoiding the possible unpleasantry, he stated,

In the same amount of time it takes to have a town hall meeting, which usually has between 30 and 100 attendees in east Texas, I can communicate with thousands of my constituent bosses through a telephone town hall meeting.

The nice thing about telephone town halls is that they are easier to control and there’s none of those unpleasant “YouTube Moments.”

He finished his declaration of avoidance by saying,

Though I am saddened if you are upset with my positions, they do appear to reflect a majority of east Texans’ views.

Since he is desperately trying to avoid dialogue with his constituents, I’m not quite sure how he would know that.

Former Disney Sculptor Creates an Anatomically Correct(?) Trump Troll Doll (NSFW)

Everybody’s least favorite web troll, Donald Trump, (aka “Herr Rump,” aka “Duh Fuhrer”) now has a doll in his image. And, fittingly, it’s a troll doll.

Careful thought was put into the details, from it’s blond mop, swept to the side to cover the tinfoil, to it’s miniature middle extremity. It even has a tiny little cell phone clutched in its tiny little hands.The only thing it doesn’t have is a “lie track,” since it doesn’t speak. But somehow, I don’t think that’s going to be missed very much.

The five inch doll is the brain child of ex-Disney sculptor, Chuck Williams.

Earlier this month, Mr. Williams started a Kickstarter campaign to raise $38,000 to start mass producing the dolls. As he stated on the site,

I want to make this figure widely available to everyone around the world that has taken a liking to my caricature sculpture and to do that I need your help to cover the costs of making the production molds and castings as well as the freight costs from the toy factory,

As of this writing, (2/22/17) over 3667 people had invested $162,481.

As to when the dolls will hit the market? According to Mr. Williams’ statement on Kickstarter,

The vinyl figures will be turned around as soon as I can get the factory on board and fulfilling the orders. I allowed a year for this under the Kickstarter protocol but I will do everything I can to make them available in a few months.

Stay tuned!

Featured Image Credit: Chuck Williams – Twitter.

Poor Trump! Picked On Because He’s A White Dude

Trump -DonkeyHoteyRush (Has anybody seen my meds?) Limbaugh has figured out the problem with Donald Trump’s (aka “Herr Rump,” aka “Duh Fuhrer”) presidency.

It isn’t that he’s a bigoted, narcissistic, autocrat wannabe, who has the mental maturity of a five-year-old and totally out of his depth. Nah, nothing like that. The problem is, that he’s WHITE! (Gasp! Who knew? All this time I thought he was orange!)

You see, according to Limbough’s  thinking, (I can’t believe I’m using “Limbaugh” and “thinking” in the same sentence.) Herr Rump wouldn’t have any problems if only he were Black like Obama. (Technical point: Obama’s only half Black, but according to the right-wing mental midgets, if you have more than two drops of blood originating in Africa, you’re Black, baby!)

You all remember how congress and the press bent over backwards to give the “Big O” everything he wanted. Well, Pepperidge Farm, I mean Rush Limbaugh remembers.

[Obama was] the first African-American president. You have everybody falling all over themselves to acknowledge that, to reward that. Obama was going to get everything he wanted in the first year because if anybody opposed it, they were going to be accused of being a racist or bigot or who knows what.

Oh, and all this nonsense about the Trump-Putin connection? According to the “missing meds man,”

It’s absurd. There is no evidence. Zilch. Zero. Nada…Who is driving this business that the Russians hacked the elections? It’s the Democrat [SIC] Party, it’s Hillary, it’s Obama, it’s all those people who just can’t accept they lost.

Featured Image: DonkeyHotey

Texas Attorney General Faces Two Felony Trials (Video)

The Texas Attorney General has been under indictment on three felony counts for almost two years and he’s still AG.

Well, what did you expect? This is Texas we’re talking about!

After a brief flurry of attention, this story has been more that a bit neglected. However, that’s about to change. In case your attention was otherwise occupied back then, a bit of background is in order.

The bigoted, anti-gay, Texas Attorney General, Ken Paxton, is TexASS-deep in a hot, steaming pile of his own doo-doo! And, it’s got nothing to do with Mexicans, Muslims or marriage equality. It seems Texas’ top lawyer (and tea party fave) may have committed securities fraud to the tune of $100,000+.

In May of 2015 he was disciplined by the Texas State Securities Board and paid a $1,000 dollar fine for acting as an investment advisor when he solicited clients for a friend’s investment firm, Mowery Capital Management (MCM).  Problem is, he wasn’t registered as an investment advisor. That’s a “no-no” under Texas law.

Paxton called this “an administrative error.”

This went down in 2004, 2005 and 2012, at which time he was also gainfully employed as a Republican state representative for District 70 in Collin County.

According to the disciplinary order,

Respondent was compensated by MCM for each solicitation resulting in a client relationship with MCM. Specifically, MCM agreed to pay Respondent 30 percent of asset management fees collected by MCM from each client that Respondent solicited successfully.

Somehow, Representative Paxton forgot to include this on his personal financial statements, filed with the Texas  Ethics Commission. (Probably just another three “administrative errors,” don’tcha know.)

After the disciplinary proceedings, a watchdog group, Texans for Public Justice, requested an investigation into whether Paxton committed any crimes in his dealings. This got tossed around like a hot potato until Colin County’s district attorney handed off the spud to the Texas Rangers. (And no, Chuck Norris wasn’t involved.)

The spud may have morphed into the proverbial can of worms. As Special Prosecutor Kent Schaffer put it,

The Rangers went out to investigate one thing, and they came back with information on something else. It’s turned into something different than when they started.

While not giving specifics, Schaffer said there are fraud allegations exceeding $100,000. Under Texas law, that’s a first degree felony with a potential reward of a 99 year vacation at the Iron Bar Resort. Also, acting as an investment advisor, without being registered, is a third degree felony.

In July of 2015 Paxton was indicted on three felony counts. One third degree and two first degree.

Ok, the back has been ordered and grounded. Flash forward to the present.

Last Thursday (2/16/17) Paxton found out he’ll be facing two separate trials on the three counts.

The first trial will be for the third-degree felony count: failure to register as an investment advisor indictment. Following that trial, he’ll find himself back in court on the twin first-degree securities fraud cases.

As the special prosecutor, Kent Schaffer, explained,

There’s nothing in common except the defendant. So for people who are sitting on a jury it’s a much more confusing situation.

Paxton’s lawyers were not pleased. They tried to object on monetary grounds.

That either double or triples the expense to Collin County. I think from a judicial resources standpoint given the fee structure that’s in place in this case that’s absurd. We are not opposed and indeed we request that they be tried together.

Sadly, for the AG, their argument did no win out.

The prosecutors also asked the judge for a change of venue. Schaffer explained that there has been an attempt to taint the county’s jury pool.

There were extraordinary and unusual things that were done in order to persuade people to form an opinion based on things outside of the courtroom.

The judge didn’t rule on the change of venue, but did say that he planned to move forward with picking a jury in Collin County.

They’ll start picking the jury in April with the first trial beginning on May, the first.

Stay tuned!